Shrinkin' Violets- Part 2 Read Here

TracyK · 09-06-2008, 09:07 AM

Terry-beautiful necklace (as usual). You are truly gifted. I am so glad things are going smoothly with your sister.

Laura-I would distance myself from that situation too. You have so many happy things to think about and plan for :)

Judy-I am so glad you pointed out that I am right here. Ugh, I hate it when that happens. You know me....

Kat-are you all better?

Pamela-so cute about Juan. Kids are so precious! We have had 3 seasons of BB huh? I am with Jane-at least survivor is starting soon!

I miss Haydee. Hope she is having fun!

I really am wondering where Tracy (inKS) is. Jenn is MIA too (at least for a day or 2).

Roll call ladies......

mdrai · 09-06-2008, 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TracyK

Roll call ladies......

Yes, I still have rolls!

Suziecat · 09-06-2008, 10:11 AM

Good Morning Girls.

I slept in and guess I needed it. I have spent the last 4 days pouring water down my throat and it finally caught up with me yesterday. I spent half the day in the bathroom peeing.

Judy, so glad you got the heater is in and running. We had to take our pump motor back to the pool company, seems the bearings burnt up in it. So it's back home and running. Hubby just told me he turned the heater on????? It's only supposed to get up to 71 degrees today. Hope he has fun in the pool. I sure do miss it though.

Kat, I purposely do NOT buy the candy corn. I will nibble till it's all gone. I won't even share with anyone. This is basically the worst time of the year for me. All that candy. But it's also my most favorite time of the year. I love Fall.

Terry, The necklace is Lovely and will look wonderful on you.

Everyone have a great day.

kity · 09-06-2008, 10:30 AM

Today I have to draft a eulogy and that is proving difficult. I'm not feeling confident that I can capsulize her life into a few paragraphs. So much of who she was was reflected in simple gestures -- the way she greeted someone at the door, or the way she threw her head back when she laughed, or the fact that she always looked her best. Just a bunch of little things that add up to one great lady. Anyway....that is my task for today. Send your energy this way, please! :-)

Terri~ In part...I think you just wrote the eulogy! That is a beautiful paragraph that shared w/ us about your mom and what a special woman she was...and is through you! Keep it simple, reflective, and peaceful...it will write itself!

xoxoxoxoox

kity · 09-06-2008, 10:41 AM

I never got to eulogize my mom. We didn't have a formal service, just a chapel room w/ my brother, nephew, SIL, and two dear friends that grew up w/ us. One of them, Robert, his mom died when he was 7 so my mom shared some mothering w/ him. I didn't even tell her closest friends that she passed. I couldn't deal w/ it...plain and simple. And my brother let me lead the way (blind leading the blind). I was 37 and he was 33 and we didn't know what we were doing and we didn't have too many examples to follow. My mom kept both her father and mothers services very small. So I guess we followed her lead. The casket was beautiful and the flowers were georgous. My friend Marc (who was at the funeral) is a professional photographer. He took one of the orange roses from the casket wreath and back lit it and took pix of it. He framed it for me and it hangs in my bedroom. That and her ballet toe shoes from when she was 7 years old are my prized possessions. She died 4 years ago tomorrow and I guess w/ the Stand up to Cancer show and Terri's mom...kinda brought up these memories. Thanks for letting me share.

Ok, need to dry the eyes and get ready. My statistician will be here in 20 min or so!

Have a great day!

**Kat817** · 09-06-2008, 11:39 AM

Terry I agree that you have part of it written already! Those are the memories that will bring her back to life and to the memories you as well as others will want to hang onto of her. As you mentioned, not the final day in bed, as she left you, but the laughter and the silliness, and particularness that made her not only your Mom but allowed you to grow into friends as well.

We sat around one evening telling stories of my Grandparents---actually with all 4---when the preacher come by to get the basics----dates, and children's names etc. the family all remained and we just shared stories, and from there, my cousin and I did our best to work as many into a 8-10 minute eulogy that we could.

Everything from my Grandpa's experience with a bear to making candy with my Grandma (where with us kids it was decorate 2 eat 1). To my other Grandpa's stint as Mayor that he won an awart presented to him for our city by then President Johnson!

In my situation, since I was the one who lived here, we used my computer to do the "writing" and to this day, I have them in hard copy form, and cannot say that I would change anything. They are not professional, and sometimes a bit sappy---but they made us smile in memory....and as difficult as they were to write, in their own way they gave back some dignity, showing a life well lived. Your rosary is lovely for your Mom, your necklace is amazingly beautiful for you---you will feel a hug from her around your neck each time you wear it! And you will honor her with words written with love, I have no doubt in my mind!

I am doing laundry today so when Rick comes in, we can get him packed. He is leaving at 10 in the morning. Will notbe back until Friday night, then we have the birthday on Sat. So.....I will have all the time in the world to clean and plan for the party.

Just made reservations for the dinner for 40 people! I refused my credit card info! The restaurant owners know us--and I am not going to be responsible if someone else is unable to pay!!!

I have to meet my SIL to do the flowere in an hour, so I better get a move on.

Will see you Vi's later!!!
Kat

TracyK · 09-06-2008, 02:26 PM

Terry-I love what you wrote this morning about your mom too.

Pamela-(((hugs)))

Michelle-funny girl....

Mine are present and accounted for as well!!

Teachlady · 09-06-2008, 02:37 PM

Good afternoon, Violets..
Just got in from the pool. It's 84 in there and awesome! Finally I get to enjoy it like I have wanted. Got all my exercises done and just floated around and relaxed. Actually spent more time than I wanted in the pool cause wasps were blocking my exit and of course the Bobster didn't hear me banging on the pool edge cause he was engrossed in a tv football game. I finally braved my way out and figured if I got stung, I'd suffer through it. I got out very slowly and climbed down the steps very slowly and got away without being stung, though one got in my hair. I got it out before it did anything. The Bobster got a few choice words involving hearing aides from me.
Everything is just about ready for the party. I made a big bunch of sloppy joes and the yard is all mowed and ready for company. It's turned out to be a beautiful Fall day here. 66 degrees and sun shining. We'll have a fire going in the fire pit and hopefully everyone will dress warm.
I'm off to get the last couple of tablecloths for the tables and then I'm done til 6 when everyone arrives.
Terry.. the necklace and the words are beautiful.
PamELa.. I lost my mom 4 years ago last April, my dad two years ago March and my brother in December of 1995. All their ashes are buried in the memorial gardens of the church. My mom was a wonderful gardener so I made sure her ashes were in a flower garden. She never got over my brother's death so I made sure they were together and even though she and my Dad didn't get along for much of their marriage, he's there too and I'm sure she's saying.. "what were you thinking????"!!
I sang for my brother's funeral and I sang for the memorial service for my Dad and the burial of all of their ashes. It was so hard to do, but I knew I had to do it, so I made it through the songs and then did my crying afterwards. I usually do that whenever I sing for a funeral. Sing and then weep.
Suzie... I'm looking forward to getting in the pool tomorrow after church. I have Ethan Monday afternoon, so I want to get my pool time in, in the morning. This month might be the last chance I get to be in the pool. It's already darn cool here in the evenings. Hopefully Indian summer will hit towards the end of September and then after that we'll shut down the pool. But the good part is we can open it up in April next year and actually be in it instead of waiting til July like this year.
Gotta run to Walmart.. Everyone have a great afternoon!!

Laura...hang in there. Sounds like you're the normal and grown up one of the family!! (((hugs)))

Suziecat · 09-06-2008, 03:23 PM

Judy, Sounds like you guys are going to have a great time this evening. I love outdoor fires. One thing I miss about going to the lake. Have fun tonight.

I just finished cleaning like crazy. I've been so busy the last couples of months, I have just put off doing it. Hubby got a little miffed when I tried to sweep around him. But all is done and I can sit back and enjoy the evening.

Tomorrow is football day. Our church picnic is also at the same time. Hubby couldn't figure that one out. I told him I didn't think that checking the football schedule was a priority with them. So we will watch the first half hour and than go over to the picnic for about an hour and than come home. I have to take a covered dish and it has to be a vegetable. Anyone got an idea for me???

I had half a muffin for breakfast and half a cup of cottage cheese and pineapple for lunch. I also had about 3 fish sticks. Not sure what dinner is going to be. I plan on making a pot of chili for tomorrow.

Monday is my Doctors appointment. I sure hope I get a fill. I sure hope he reams my butt also while I'm there. Or at least kick it real good.

Hugs to all. Haydee- we miss you.

Teachlady · 09-06-2008, 03:53 PM

Suzie.. simple veggie dish and yummy. 4 cans of corn and 1 8 oz. pkg of cream cheese. Heat up both together until the cream cheese melts.. easy peasy..

janiebug · 09-06-2008, 05:13 PM

Just ran home and then off in 1/2 hour to the church picnic. Got a letter in the mail from my fill Dr. that said they canceled my appointment the end of the month. This is soooooo aggravating!!! He only does it 2 hours month on the fourth friday and I can't do it the fourth Friday in October. I am sooo mad!!!!! Good thing it is a catholic church I am going to so I can have a beer!!
Okay no more venting, I am off to freshen up and change my clothes!!
Have a good night!!!

lunasa · 09-06-2008, 06:09 PM

Hi Girls,

I REALLY would appreciate your feedback / experienced input here.
I'm just trying to figure out why my band has progressively gotten tighter in the 8-10 weeks since my last clinic visit. I had perfect restriction to begin with & gradually it tightened to the point where I can't even drink a cup of tea!

HERE'S MY QUERY FOR YOU..
in your opinion, would being de-hydrated tighten the band?

PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE / PERSONAL EXPERIENCE / THEORIES

Jennifur · 09-06-2008, 06:53 PM

Hey everyone
reading post and doing different things

I am going to be doing a walk I just found out about
https://afsp.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.participant&eventID=531&participantID= 15199

It is something very personal to me and I am poor, so I only obligated myself to $20 donation, the walk is very important to me and I didn't want to be stressed about money.

As some or most of you know...I began really gaining weight after Dylan was born.... I can honestly say it was not from him per say, but from severe depression after having him and the stuff I was dealing with Kevin that emotionally drained me. Anyway, I was not up 20lbs and months and months of therapy. After all that therapy my Dr. told me to call one of my best friends I had lost touch with (again you all know why I lost touch) so I did, it was the best thing I could have ever done - After spending all of my free time with this friend, he became a very important part of my life again.

One weekend in July, I was having my daughter's birthday party, he was camping all week and was not sure if he would make it back but if he didn't promised to come over the next weekend. Well the week went by and I didn't hear from him or see him (I saw him every morning on my way to work) I was getting worried. A few days later I had a missed call at my house from his brother, I freaked out and called him, his machine was not picking up, I called his brother, no return calls, Finally after being frantic for 2 days, I called a mutual friend who's wife said I knew you didn't know, you would have been there... He had killed himself. I will never forget those words, Everything went numb and i fell to the ground, I couldn't breathe, I felt like I was not real.

Needless to say, I blamed myself, he loved me as much as I love Kev and I knew that.. and suddenly I had gained another 50lbs and wouldn't leave my house other than work, I cried for months, even years. It was only about 6 months ago was the first time I could talk without crying. I still go to the cemetary as much as possible and do not have a minute in my life where I do not think about him and understand why he did that.... He had so many people who loved him and would have helped but just would not talk to any of us.

So... knowing that, he changed my life in many ways but doing that - and there is not a day that goes by that i don't miss him with all I have, but I know that I would not have met all my violets if I had not gained all that weight. I know that I am a stronger person for dealing with his death on my own, and I know that it is not my fault he took his life -

This is after much more therapy. He took his Life in Sept 2004 - I don't want to ever have to experience this again, or have anyone else in my life have to experience it either.

So, I just needed to share this with my Violet Sisters - more because it is a big part of why i break down a lot and something I don't share in such detail.

Love you all

Jennifur · 09-06-2008, 07:04 PM

Hi guys
sorry for the drama post... something i've been working on yesterday and today.

I was late yesterday and went to have a drink and a share nachos with friends... my treat for all the hard work, I was in home by 7 and alseep on the couch at 8. I was beat.

Got up at midnight to pick up a friend who was at the bar and couldn't drive, and stayed and drank water for 3 hrs.

Got up late this am, went to pick up friends car, grocery shopping, cooked some food (stew beef black bean spicey chili) went to the gym, had a cheese burger and here I am.

Terry - what a beautil necklace

I'm sending the dress back I got, I'm wearing the dress I wore to grams funeral to the wedding. It was snug then and I had to wear a sucker in thing, fits perfectly now without the sucker in thing.... and if i lose another 5-10lbs in 3 weeks like i would love to, it will just fit perfectly!

Well, i'm going to shower from the gym, i'm yucky

ttyl

mdrai · 09-06-2008, 08:01 PM

Lunasa, I have no idea & have not experienced that... my band always loosens as time goes by... but I'd suggest calling your doctor asap! Good luck!

((Jen)) You're safe here, friend!

Judy... hope your party is going well!!

An early Sat eve for me tonight, as I have to awaken @ 6am to take ds to an early soccer game... g'nite!