What do you say when people push food on you?

Thread Starter  

I'm not yet banded, but given that fact that my plan is to keep it a secret from everyone I know, I'm thinking about being at family dinners, dinner parties, restaurants, after I've eat my tiny portion - And I can imagine people will say things like, "what's wrong? why aren't you eating? don't you like the food? have some more!". I quit drinking for alchohalic reasons and I deal with people pushing drinks on me all the time. It's funny how well-intentioned people can be so pushy sometimes with food and drink. I'll guess I'll just say, no thanks, I'm dieting and so I'm cutting down on my portions.

I too have pretty much kept my banding confidential. Only my husband, parents, and 3 close friends know. I have simply been telling people I am dieting. Harder than food though, has been turning down diet coke... my well known additcion. I said I read something about carbonated drinks causing you to feel more hungry than other beverages, and so far I think people are buying it.

Good luck to you

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Good question and you answered with what Im telling those I work with. I am not telling the people I work around. Only my immediate family will know. At this point Im not telling my closest friends either since they tend to lecture and sabatoge. I did well on southbeach until my closest friend who at the time didnt understand the plan lectured on health hazards- since she has lost 60# and maintained for 1.5yr on Southbeach! She now pushes it on everyone. It was the biggest fight our friendship survived. I digress- Im telling everyone Im cutting back that the time has come and I have to do something to live healthier.

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215H/208S/160C/150G
Banded 9/14/06 9.75cm 4cc band
11-14-06 1cc fill
1-2-07 0.5cc total 1.5cc
4-20-07 0.5cc total 2cc(in theory)






Broken tubing 10/08

Tell them, you are eating normal portions like everyone should, they are being miss piggy:p

I just say "no thanks, I"m full" I dont find it difficult.

But then, I didnt hide the fact that I had a band either, and if someone pushed it on me, I'd say why I couldnt eat more.

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Jacqui

I just say "no thank you". If somebody really does push hard, depending what time of day the function is, I will say I had a large breakfast or large lunch - just not hungry, thank you though. I find more often than not, people do not say anything. If you have a plate in front of you that is all they are concerned about, not how much you have on that plate.

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J.S.

I simply say, "No thanks, I'm good." Then I fill up on water so I feel full and not be tempted. Drinking alot of water really curbs your appetite and makes you feel full fairly quickly. It's an old trick.

In answering this same question, someone who had GBS told me recently that they say "No I can't eat that. It gives me a reaction"....and of course I said..."Yeah, the reaction is that it makes me fat".

I like the "No...I'm good" phrase. It's dismissing - probably stops the pushing - but it's nice. I like that one and will use it. Thnx.

I've told everyone that I'm on a "doctor supervised liquid diet" for six weeks. It's not like that they don't know I'm overweight. I don't know what excuse I'll use for the mushies but I'll come up with something.

I've watched my (as Jack says) "normo" friends and they actually eat in pea sized bites and unbelievably small portions (like 3 ounces of protein...I mean really!). They talk during dinner and push their food around their plate.

Here's a big bonus...no more spilled food down the front of you! What a great NSV....it's almost impossible to spill food if you're not shoveling it in! (which I'm sure you never did, but it was a pretty regular thing with me) :)

Good luck to you.

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Lyn

Sweet Sue,

I also have not told anyone, besides my husband, that I've been banded. I did have a plan to tell my closest friends but after I invited everyone over for a bon fire, i brought up the topic of WLS and they all had nothing but harsh words to say.. so i never told them. Anyway, back to your question. This is what I did.

I told people I had hernia surgery, Yoda gave me the idea. :) I then told everyone the doc put me on fluids for a couple of weeks, everyone bought it. Then I got to the mushie stage and i'm telling people that after having the liquid diet, i'm having a hard time rushing back into solids, so I'm slowly working my way back. Then once you get to you solid stage you tell people, like someone else mentioned, that you are eating normal amounts of food. 3 oz of meat, then your cup of veggies and so on.

I hate to lie, no matter what the situation is but for me, I'm not going to give anyone a chance to watch over every bite i put in my mouth nor am I going to listen to anyone put me down for losing weight by taking "the easy way out". This is much harder than a non banded person can imagine. You still need to work at it, the weight just doesn't come off on it's own. It's all about making the right choices. IMO

Best of luck to you!

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Isn't that the truth! I'm looking forward to some new tops that don't have grease stains on them. No more food-colored shirts :D

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5/9/06: 4cc at NWWLS - Everett, WA
232 H / 220 S/ 145 Current
1st: 7/14/06: 1.5 cc
2nd: 8/8/06: +0.3 cc (1.8)
3rd: 10/04/06: +.03 cc (2.1)
4th: 12/06/06: +.04 cc (2.5)
5th: 1/24/07: +.05 (3.0)

I Didn't Hide My Band.toooo Many People Knew What I Was Doing.in Burleson,doing Nails What Else Do You Have To Talk About.my Main Topic Was Diets.tell Them Your On A New Diet.that Is The 4 Letter Word To My Husband.ha,leva

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http://[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loSS

I had a difficult time at first dealing with those who were nosey, or tried to get me to eat.....but I figured my business is my business.....I don't have to tell anyone if I don't feel like it....only the ones I want to know will know.

At that time I struggled because I didn't want anyone guessing either...I'm very private about this. So, I was always trying to be careful not to say anything that would tip them off.

Now.....the weight loss is noticeable so they obviously know that I'm doing something to lose weight. So...when they are nosey, or try to get me to eat more.....I tell them that I'm working very very hard to maintain a healthy lifestyle through healthy eating habits. If they persist....I get bold and tell them to stop attempting to sabotage my hard work and efforts....that always shuts them up. As for the nosey ones....when they want to know more like what plan or program am I on.....I just tell them that I'm following the food pyramid, making healthier choices and watching my portion control....which isn't a lie.

Carol

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Don't eat it Carol, just smear it on your ass cause that's where its going anyhow!


Banding date: June 8/6
Dr. Joffe & Dr. Yau - TLBC

7th fill: Nov 27 T 9.5cc

I tell people that I have decided to eat like a super model, the food is delicious but I only eat a small amount. The hardest part is in restaurants where I take 2 bites and leave the rest over. in most restaurants the waiter will ask if everything is OK, then the matre D' will ask if I want something else. I usually say that the food is delisious and I am just no longer hungry. My wife on the other hand likes to make up excuses and say that I am not feeling well. I hate when she does that. One time the check came and the waiter pointed out that he did not charge me for my meal, I insisted that he recalcualte the bill and charge me as the food was fantastic even though I only had 2 bites.

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Saul
Dr. George Fielding (my hero) NYU Hospital
Pre Op 265 lbs
Banded March 6, 2006 259lbs
First fill April 25, 2006 250lbs
May 31, 2006 213lbs
June 20, 2006 209lbs
July 18, 2006 209lbs still

Thanks but it looks like you need it more than I do.......................have fun with it.

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....probably you will come to have a number of differing responses that evolve over time as you become more used to your New Life....

Untraining our friends who have helped overfed us for years requires some minor attention to the message we continue to give them....and "No thanks" works most of the time...

It helped me become more publically commited to my own answer, as I found I could accept or refuse based on HUNGER rather than other factors....

Eating is becoming more of a pleasure again for me, as I grow more secure in the actual fact, that USUALLY my Bandster amounts really ARE enough....and on the rare occassions where I still actually DO have 'non-satiety hunger' [rather than 'gee-what would the BROWNIE taste like''] I can have a cup or 1/2 cup or a few bites of something more...no big deal, and no, I don't feel compelled to consume 'the WHOLE THING'.

It was a big step for me to realize the mission was to 'become Satiated' rather than 'eat THIS WHOLE THING' for some reason or other (don't waste food/children are starving/you'll EAT what's ON your PLATE/there's just a LITTLE bit left/etcetcetc)


A little behavioral self analysis is not too difficult....just as we train our puppies, we can train our own habits....to some extent....

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373/258
"Carpe mañana"
*Oldtimers posse: surgery 12/21/04*

My Quest is Victory over the Dragons of Habit, Gluttony, Sloth, Desperation...