Did your un-banded spouse lose weight after you got banded?

Hi,

This is my first post. I searched the forums and couldn't find this covered anywhere, but if it has been discussed on end, please just point me to the thread.

Anyway, I am in the last month of my insurance-required 6-month diet and hope to be banded in late July. I have been overweight to some extent since junior high. Current BMI is 42.6.

My DH on the other hand has always been thin. At least, UNTIL he met me! He is still not fat, but probably is 10 - 20 pounds over his ideal weight. For example, he is 6' tall and wears 38" jeans...he wore 31" to 32" jeans when I met him 9 years ago (probably a bit underweight then) so I take some responsibility for his current weight, as I probably do encourage him to eat with me at times where on his own he would probably not. Such as "let's order a dessert and split it..., etc".

I was wondering if my DH might lose the 10-20 pounds he is over his ideal weight after I have surgery just because I won't be buying fattening food to have around the house or be encouraging him to eat with me. What have others' experiences been? Thanks for your help.

Stacey

Initially my husband gained weight, because I was constantly giving him the food from my plate that I wasn't eating. He gained about 10 pounds (not too bad...he went from 185 to 195 and he is 6 ft.). Then, a year later, when he realized that he gained 10 pounds, he decided to take note of what he was eating. He realized it was just him eating off of my plate. Now, with a little more mindfull eating, he is losing those 10 pounds with lots of nutritional help from me. I have helped him pay attention to his portion sizes, eat more protein, eat slowly and eat good quality, healthy food. Now it is a no-brainer for both of us. We both eat completely differently than we did before my surgery, and we both feel so much better!

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Unfortunately, my DH gained - and continues to gain! For the meals he cooks, he still cooks more than I can eat despite doing this for 16 months now! As well, where we used to split a bottle of wine at dinner, as I have almost completely given up alcohol, he consumes the whole thing - lots of empty calories there!

Changing how much you cook is a hard habit to break. I have reduced it a lot, but still end up with an extra meal. I can't tolerate leftover meat, so my wife has the leftover for her lunch the next day.

She eats less when she is with me, but gets very frustrated when were not together because she eats too much. That is why she is getting a sleeve next month.

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"I am by far skinny. I still weigh 228lbs. My problem is that my husband weighs 350lbs and will not do anything about it. When we got together we were both smaller. He weighed about 240. He has no control of food what so ever. He has eaten 3lbs of fudge this week and a whole pie. (we went to amish country last saturday) It makes me angry. Even before i had the surgery I had some control. I am so scared that I am going to wake up one morning and not find him attractive. He is the love of my life and my best friend. I don't want this to hurt my marriage but I also want to stay physically attracted to him. I have tried to get him to walk in the evenings with me and I cook mostly healthy meals."

The message above is one I posted a few weeks ago. I am hoping that my change will make him want to change.

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Banded 2/20/2009
Banded by Dr. Bali
Charleston, WV
High/Current/Goal
254/222/150

Thread Starter

Hi again,

I think I should note that my husband is still in the average weight range and before I met him was slim or skinny. Perhaps being overweight most of my life makes me attracted to skinny guys. :-) Before meeting me, he was never overweight even.

Anyway, I am not really worried about my hubby gaining weight, as he has been about the same weight for the last 3-4 years. I am just wondering if he will go back to the pre-Stacey eating habits he had before we met. I do tend to suggest eating things for dinner/snacks that might not be the best choices...thus my need for WLS.

Stacey

Unfortunately, my poor hubby will probably gain some weight before all is said and done. I've been cooking the foods I'd like to eat and feeding them to him! He's lovin' life like the butcher's dog.

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Anyone ever see that tv aid for slimquick that the women says this is how i loose weight and her boobies deflat and this is how my husband loses weight and he gets really skinning and his pants falls off. That's the first thing that popped into my mind when you said about hubby. You watch we get the LAP-BAND® and they will loose weight too!!! LAP-BAND® sympathy pains (lol)

My husband is only 185lbs so i don't think he will loose anyweight but he will eat healthier now that i am cooking healthier.

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Banded May 12, 2009!!!!!
may 12 -4.25 cc surgery
June 19-first fill 1.5cc total 5.75cc
July 16-2nd fill .50cc total 6.25cc
Oct 15-3rd fill .25 total 6.50

S 280 /C 228.5/G 160

TOTAL LOST 52

My DH didnt lose. He kept trying, but the thing is, our family diet WAS very healthy to begin with and DH is a very healthy eater - he honestly has the slowest metabolism you could imagine and he sits in the car for about 2 hours per day and a desk for at least 9. He gets no exercise.

I got fat on what I ate in ADDITION to what I fed my family, lol.

So to be 250lb at 6ft 3, he really did OK, not to be much fatter.

So his eating habits really did not change and he didnt lose. Eventually he got banded to and has enjoyed a very slow but dependable weight loss, however he needs to eat less than I do to lose weight. But he does no exercise still.

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Jacqui

I have lost 43.4 pounds so far. My DH has lost about 30 (w/o the band).

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254.2/205.6
Weight @ Surgery/Current