Why are YOU Fat?

DeLarla · 07-28-2005, 03:50 PM

Thanks for keeping this thread going. I tell a lot of people to come here (I even told my surgeon to read this post.) I always assumed everyone was overweight for the same reasons, but that's not the case.

I have the #1 Combo Upsized, which comes with the dysfunctional family, the obesity gene, the "clean plate or die" threat, and a side of the there-was-no-food-as-a-child-so-make-up-for-lost-time-now. With a large Diet, please.

Carrie22803 · 07-29-2005, 01:05 PM

DeLarla, I just have to say reading your posts are great, you are funny, yet honest and upfront about what you've done wrong as well as what you're trying to accomplish. It takes guts to say, 'I've messed up', and 'I've gained weight'. It sucks! But you are a great person, and I know things will turn around and you'll be back on the losing side soon!!!

NJChick · 07-29-2005, 03:50 PM

Why am I so fat... okay....

I'm the youngest of 7 children. Mom & Dad (poorly educated) always working. Dad was a happy lovabe drunk, always worked but had no time for us kids. Mom (who can't read, write or drive) struggled with two jobs just to keep us fed. My Mom know's what starvation is and never wanted her kids to ever know that feeling.

Our dinner table was always full of breads, potatoes, pasta, rice, starches, anything that stuck to 9 hungry bellies.

Never abused physically as a kid but emotionally negelected, okay, totally ignored. Never encouraged, never complemented. If I was noticed I was mocked for being fat. I wouldn't dare open my mouth because no matter what I said I was shot down and called stupid.

Food became my best friend, my love. It never put me down and it was always there by my side, It was my way out and it felt so good, still does. Lived with alot of people but grew up very lonely. Still to this day, I can be in a room with 100 people and still feel alone.

My Weight Chart:

Age 0 - 7: Skinny kid.
Age 7: moved to a new town, very shy, no friends, started gaining weight.
Age 7 - 20: Highest weight was 300+
Age 20: My Father died of Cancer. Shortly after I met the love of my life (so I thought), he dumped me and I was so heart broken I couldn't eat for months, I mean this man loved me, all 300 lbs of ME. So the depression and starvation process began.
Age 22: I weighed 150 lbs (starvation).
Age 23 - 25: Met new boyfriend, fell in love, got married - weighed 160 lbs
Age 25 - 33: Kept weight between 175 - 185 lbs (but notice it rising).
Age 33: Sister died unexpected. Rapid weight gaining started 100 + lbs. Major depression starts.
Age 36: Weighed 226 lbs (got pregnant and swore I wouldn't get any bigger).
Age 37: Had DD and at the end of the pregnancy weighed 260 lbs, lost 38 lbs and gained it back same year (postpartum depression is why I lost the 38).
Age 38: Weighed 250 lbs.
Age 39: Lost 30 lbs with Atkins Diet
Age 40: Gained back 30+ lbs lost on Atkins Diet
Age 40: Diagnosed with ADHD
Age 40: I weigh approximately 254 lbs.
Age 40: Tired of losing the battle, tired of the struggle, TIRED!
Age 40: Seeking Lap Band

I have arthritis in my knees since I'm 12 (and in my back). Bone spurs and DDDisease in my spine.

I have gone to psy doctors for therapy time and time again...sigh.

My entire life I have been on every stinkin diet there is, tried all diet pills. Last diet pill tried was this year, May, 2005, Merida (still some left in my purse).

July, 2005 - Researching Lap Band Surgery
August 2, 2005 - Going to Doctor for medical lap band referal.
August 9, 2005 - Going to Surgeons Seminar on lap band.

This is me..... Eileen

spunky · 07-31-2005, 03:56 PM

Why am I fat? Hmm... I eat when I am stressed, depressed, PMSing, family celebrations, lunch with friends, drinks and more drinks with coworkers. I wake up in the morning with food on my mind and go to bed at night hating myself for all that I ate. I always tell myself that tomorrow I will start dieting, but tomorrow always comes and goes. I am being banded on Aug. 16 and I am hoping and praying that this will help my issues with my weight.

Jachut · 08-06-2005, 08:44 PM

I also dont see my fat in the mirror. Because I'm very tall, my slip from overweight into obesity hasnt actually added much inches to my frame. Gone up one clothes size but am 20kg heavier. There just hasnt been that in your face STOP signal for me, until I started to feel crap. I was surprised when the physio said to me that my feet hurt because of my weight, I've had vulnerable ankles all my life. I dont see that if I go out and jog I may hurt myself (which is why one ankle now is really giving me trouble).

I know I'm bigger than others, I know I cant buy clothes in normal shops but I really dont think I realise how fat I am.

Kbel · 08-06-2005, 09:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jachut

I also dont see my fat in the mirror. Because I'm very tall, my slip from overweight into obesity hasnt actually added much inches to my frame. Gone up one clothes size but am 20kg heavier. There just hasnt been that in your face STOP signal for me, until I started to feel crap. I was surprised when the physio said to me that my feet hurt because of my weight, I've had vulnerable ankles all my life. I dont see that if I go out and jog I may hurt myself (which is why one ankle now is really giving me trouble).

I know I'm bigger than others, I know I cant buy clothes in normal shops but I really dont think I realise how fat I am.

I know exactly how you feel. Those comments: "Oh but you are tall and you can carry a bit of weight" drive me a bit nuts because they give me an 'out'. I too don't feel as big as I know I am although one slip of the digital camera and a photo in a bathing suit soon confirms it! Although, even then it is hard to reconcile that really fat person as me. As for the shopping - I can't wait to go on my first 'normal shop' shopping spree!!!!!!

Jachut · 08-06-2005, 09:41 PM

Its not always a blast being tall - my ideal weight is really about 75kg and its a weight I managed to maintain for a few years in my early 20's but even then I couldnt shop in normal stores. I was just too large framed.

People's body shapes are different too - I have a girlfriend about the same height/size as me, she wears 2 whole sizes smaller than I do! I am more pear shaped, she has really really thick legs with no ankles :-)

maudeispam · 08-07-2005, 09:04 AM

I am fat because I eat well. I love chocolate and good food. Family/Friend functions always center around food. "Who's bringing the potato salad and chocolate cake?" Lack of exercise. I quit moving (walking, riding a bike, running) when I got my first car. I was always fat from about age 3. My parents and grandparents are/were all fat. I was teased and tormented all through school because I was fat. I eat fast...slowing done now(post op), but old habits are hard to change. I eat out of boredom. I will conquer this battle and I will win!

banded_for_life · 08-08-2005, 11:28 AM

Hi everybody, waiting on banding surgery approval, but this is such a great thread I just had to chime in.

I don't remember a time when I wasn't fat. I specfically remember being 145 in 6th grade...maybe the torture I dealt with imprinted it on my brain. School can be brutal to an overweight child. I was also apart of the clean up your plate generation. Having obese grandmothers on both sides of my family didn't help. Then if that is not enough let's throw in parents and two siblings neither of whom have any weight issues and voila' you get a 270 woman...eventually. My mother, bless her heart just had no idea how to deal with an overweight child, so she pushed the diet issue. Made it a control issue, until no matter what diet I was on, I was going to gain weight...it was mine and there was nothing she could do to change it. Of course, to this day if I even smell vanilla slim fast powder, I start heaving.

I could blame on instances of sexual abuse from strangers as a small child, but ultimately the power to lose weight belongs to me. I am like all of you, I eat for whatever reason I can think of, sadness, depression, happiness, boredom...the entire gamult of emotions to eat. But I have been waiting for three years for this surgery and my time is at hand. I want to be healthier for my two kids and not be the mom that has a hard time taking care of herself hygenically and had to have her kids her kids help put on her sandles...no more!!!! This is going to work for me and to hell with all the demons that wait to whisper negative things in my head.

A future sucess in the making.

270 and waiting!

Lisa Marie C · 08-18-2005, 06:13 PM

I have been overweight most of my life. My childhood was not exactly a great one. My father was an alcoholic and my mom worked a lot so my wonderful maternal grandparents took care of me. I come from an Italian/German/and whatever else that is mixed in family. So I was always taught to have 1sts, 2nds, 3rds, and then some. All through my school years I was tortured by kids. I finally hit junior high and that is when I began losing weight and was down to a size 10/12. I still loved food and I still do. I got pregnant right after highschool graduation. I only gained 24 lbs with that pregnancy. But after I gave birth I still ate like I was still pregnant. I joined Weight Watchers and lost about 30 lbs but could never stick with it. 3 yrs later I was pregnant again. I gained 26 lbs with that pregnancy and then afterwards gained about 100. I am really happy I was banded 8/10 and looking forward to starting fresh. Happier, Healthier, and thinner.

Love,
Lisa

08-18-2005, 11:31 PM

I am fat because I love food. Although I grew up with all the issues everyone else seems to have, one of my brothers was tall and thin and not addicted to food. So, I really can't blame my parents, my emotions, my ex-husband, my kids, or anyone but ME for the fact I love to cook and I love to eat!

However, I turned a corner last week. Food no longer is an issue with me. I'm to the point, after 10 months, that I forget to eat and have to remind myself!

Parvathi · 08-21-2005, 10:46 PM

I'm fat because I love food. Like BandedPrincess, I love to cook and I love to eat.

I had a really happy childhood for the most part, celebrated good times with food. Mourned the bad times with food. Passed the boredom with food. Fought back the anger with food. Enjoyed the company of friends and family with food.

I'm slowly learning to eat to live, rather than living to eat though. I've even cooked a pan of brownies to bring the office workers recently, without indulging in one myself. Back in the day, half the pan would have been gone before I even got to the office heh.

PinkMary · 08-28-2005, 03:04 AM

I was never a fat kid or teenager.. i was always a skinny girl till my 27 years..
i had pcychological problems and i was hurting myself this way ...
i was suffering by panic attacks and i still have anxiety, im still on meds, (Xanax, Seropram), im still working with myself to overcome the memories of a violent father,
a careless mom and the war i had against me of my husbands mother and sister...
the good is that i know how and why started my eating disorder..
Band helps me with the symptoms.. being fat! ..but the real problem i fight it with
my psychiatrist and myself

**Jack** · 08-28-2005, 08:20 AM

....I've had a tough time coming up with an answer to the original question.....

Now in my case I have finally managed to find TWO WORDS to answer "Why am I fat"....

......"Oinkee oinkee"..... HAR!!

oh, the inhumanity!!..... :banana :banana :banana :banana :banana

aneffie53 · 09-06-2005, 09:01 PM

Interesting thread, I've enjoyed reading the posts as many rang true for me.

Why am I fat? Well it's alot of things for me, including:

I snack when I'm stressed. I can remember night after night studying (as my children slept), and pouring a big bowl of M&M's to reward myself.
Abuse as a child, I think pushed me to subconsiously overeat. The therapist during my psych evalucation told me that this is a very common thread with heavy women.
I also use food for comfort. One of my favorate foods as a young adult was a pot of hot Tapicoa pudding made from scratch (yes I'd eat the whole thing).
And finally I'm firmly convinced that dieting made me fat. Even though I was over weight for a few pre-teen years, I really didn't gain significant weight until I started dieting after the birth of my first child. Lose 30 gain 50 etc.

Thanks for asking the question, and for everyones posts.

Why are YOU Fat?

DeLarla is wonderful!

Why am I fat??... Well it all started since birth..