Why are YOU Fat?

josygirl · 06-10-2005, 07:57 AM

To me the question is WHY am I fat? not why am i FAT?, I hate how I look, I hate being fat so why do I do this to myself? I've done well with the banding but i've had some work stress this week and my eating is out of control. I hate that I do this to myself.

Guess everyone has their own individual battle. We have similarities to what we experience but we each fight our own battle. It's scary to be so alone with the food demon isn't it?

mom2mygirlz920 · 06-10-2005, 09:33 AM

Dear Bandsters, Why am I fat......Hmmmm. I am 5'7 and 231 lbs this moment. But up until about 6 years ago, I was 170. Overweight but no drastically. I had my 1st daughter in 2000 and went up to 260 day of delivery, back down to 230 after. Stayed there. Went back up over the next 3 years to 240, pregnant again and went up to 290 during pregnancy. After my 2nd daughter in 2003, stayed around 257 until day of surgery. Being overweight for me started with having my kids but sure didnt end there. I could eat 3 packs of cherry poptarts easily up until 2 weeks before my surgery. I ate to deal with emotions boredom and what not. Hubby ticked me off, let's go have some ice cream. Kids driving me crazy, ugh, whats there to eat. Always a reason. I have also had 2 knee surgeries in the past 6 years. One in 1999, minor arthoscopic to clean up some arthritis. Another in 2004 (a year on the 12th) where I dislocated my knee cap by 2.5 inches. And no that wasnt fun at all. It hurt like hell. I took vicoDin starting then and realized that in april of 2005 I was still taking them. For different reason. To feel better about myself, energy. happiness. I stopped ans said OMG. I looked into the LAP-BAND® for my mom, who also takes pain pills every day, is overweight from 3 pregnancies and has lost and gained weight back many times over again, and in her I saw me. I love her but not her way of life. I thought about this band and told my husband i was considering it. He said, Honey i love u, whatever makes u happy and healthy. SO we went together to a meeting on April 28. I had an appointment for the 30 with the surgeon. at this point I was still a little skeptical. i left it in fates hands. I told my husband that if insurance approved it I was doing it. I had all my tests on May 4th, endoscopy on May 19. They called me May 20th and said I was approved. Well holy crap. they gave me a surgery daye of May 31st and here I am. Banded. I started in April at 257, I am down to 232 and SMILING. Hardly any pain meds, no more knee or foot pain and I am enjoying my girls to the fullest!!!! YOU ARE ALL TO THANK AS WELL. YOU GUYS ARE SUCH AWESOME SUPPORT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NEONATAL RN · 06-30-2005, 11:06 AM

Oh, I am so glad someone else knowa the pleasure of deep fried dill pickles. I live in NYC now and they have never heard of such a thing. It is amazing how anyone in the south lives past 50, and that they are all not 300 plus pounds. My band has helped me stop the overeating but I still don't know what "full" feels like. Either I am eating or I have overeaten and have to PB. Maybe there is no happy full feeling anymore, but thats okay. I have 3.3cc in, have lost 80 and am struggling to lose the rest. Of course if I would exercise it would happen, but.....

DeLarla · 06-30-2005, 12:05 PM

I'm still just as fat today as I was when I weighed 70 pounds more. My head hasn't changed, so I'll probably lose my band eventually.

I admit it, I'm a bad Bandster. Well, I'm not bad, I just don't follow the rules because my obsessive-compulsive-overeating-binging-addictive nature doesn't give a damn if I'm hurting myself. Put a Band around a smoker's lungs and they'll smoke anyway.

How much do the Mexican doctors charge for that lobotomy?

This, my friends, is why I'm always laughing. There's no reason to cry; this is life, make the best of it, fat or thin.

DeLarla · 06-30-2005, 12:09 PM

And I realize this is a huge hijack, but deep fried pickles are wrong, wrong, wrong. No, no, no.

A group of us ordered a massive take-home meal from a popular rib joint in Las Vegas. We all tore into the FRIED ZUCCINI first, then we all ran around the house spitting out the rancid, spoiled appetizers. It was truly disgusting, so we called the rib joint who told us they removed zuccini from the menu and replaced it with deep fried pickles, which NOBODY in Vegas has ever heard of. Nasty, nasty trick.

Maybe if we knew they were pickles they'd have a chance, but I"m ruined for life.

Zoe · 06-30-2005, 12:15 PM

Oh, come on DeLarla, give those fried pickles a chance! I am descended from generations of northerners who wouldn't know a decent bit of sweet potato pie if it were tossed in their faces, but when I went to Alabama a few years ago and was offered deep fried pickles I fell in love with them. Of course, I was expecting that sour crunch... I suppose your experience was more like asking for Godiva chocolate and getting Ex-Lax.

DeLarla · 06-30-2005, 12:20 PM

We thought we were eating rotten zuccini! Still spitting. Zoe, you come to the bash in September and fry us up some pickles and I'll give them one more chance, but I'm not making any promises.

DeLarla · 06-30-2005, 12:33 PM

Trish, all I see is your smiling sunshine face. Next time get the license plate number and ol' DeLarla will hunt her down for you. I'm really good at dealing with that kinda person. Some young kids did that to me once, and I chased them down in my car laughing. I told them, "you wouldn't be checking me out if you didn't think I was sexy, huy baby?" The guy that made the fat joke turned beat red while his friends started laughing at him. Soon they were on my side and their friend was the idiot.

You are still fabulous.

vinesqueen · 06-30-2005, 12:42 PM

oh Trish, Honey! Just remember, you may be fat, but she's stupid. You are changing and loosing weight, but there aint no cure for stupid.

TrishS · 06-30-2005, 01:13 PM

Thanks for the uplift!!! Hey Lisa... Im making you my personal body guard... Thats a big job you know.. I have lots of body to guard. lol

"no cure for stupid".... Thats a good one... Thanks, I needed that smile!!!

**Iluvharleys** · 06-30-2005, 02:31 PM

Trish - I'm sorry someone was so rude that they couldn't keep their mouth shut! People like that should remember what goes around comes around, and their day is on the way! :D :D :D

"Nita · 06-30-2005, 03:18 PM

I think part (one part of many) of my problem is that unlike many people who always see themselves as fat even if they aren't, I never saw how big I was getting. Even at 300 lbs. I didn't really see it. I remember thinking how nice my cleavage looked...no, it just looked overful cause I was huge but when I would look in the mirror I just sucked in the best I could and didn't look at angles I knew would be bad. It would always takes me by surprise and hurts my feelings so bad when someone makes a comment like (one of my favorites ..not...LOL) you are really pretty for being such a big girl. Or...how about, you have a pretty face, have you thought about losing some weight?, another not favorite...

So I guess a big part of my problem in adition to turning to food as comfort and binges of ice cream and whatever else I craved is denial. I don't know how I don't see the fat in the mirror. Show me a photo and that's another story. I have sworn before that something was wrong with the camera lense, LOL I actually remember getting so mad at my husband after he snapped some shots of me at the beach because I thought he was such a horrible photographer. How could he only get bad angles and unflattering lighting. LOL!!! Of course in hind site I realize it was the subject not the photographer but somehow I just never see it at the time.

jqpublic · 06-30-2005, 05:56 PM

Trish sorry to hear about those comments some people are just rude & Ignorant...The
sad thing is they teach there kidds to treat people the same way! If people only new how words hurt. I ,am happy to see your smiling face here ( trying ) to do some thing about your weight Issue.....the old saying is if there talking about you then there leaving me alone.Haha. just roll with it soon the weight will be off you will feel so much better you have took the 1st step to better health I wish you much luck.

Take care God bless

Carrie22803 · 07-28-2005, 12:36 PM

You guys have me laughing my butt off...there surely is no cure for stupid, but sometimes I still wish there was an easy cure for being overweight. I will not say fat!! I was chubby in middle school, wich wasn't helped by the fact that my mother loves short hair - as in Peter Pan - so I looked like a boy with a bowl cut...I've finally forgiven my mother for that (ha) but I think my family really had a lot to do with it. I was raised to clean my plate and to eat dessert after every meal, and my father had gastric bypass 2 yrs. ago,so there you go...but really, I think it's a combo of genetics (my whole family plus some extended family are large) and psychological stuff. I also am on medication for depression, which my mother and grandmother also had. I was thin in highschool and the beginning of college (until 22yrs old) but I still thought I was fat and felt huge next to other girls. I got married at 22, had my beautiful son at 23, and now am 25 and 243lbs. on surgery day. I felt I had a license to eat when I was pregnant, and eat I did - Popeye's baby! Olive Garden! yum....ok, I'm back. Anyway, I was somewhat confused after the birth of my son when I looked like I was still pregnant (you mean your body doesn't just shrink back to pre-pregnancy status?) and I was depressed, I probabaly had post-partum but never checked into it...so, let more eating ensue. I lost weight briefly, went down to 188, then right back to 240. Doesn't help that my husband is ridiculously handsome (sorry, but he is) works out everyday and can eat a barge full of food and not gain a pound of fat. Just nice muscles. Jerk. So, by my joking thru this, which is why people don't ever know I'm battling depression, I basically am saying that I think a lot (most) of it had to do with me, my image of myself, unhappiness with myself, etc. Someone said earlier "I'm not miserable because I'm fat, I'm fat because I'm miserable" and that struck a chord with me. So, I pretty much dislike myself and don't think I am worth the time and energy it takes to eat right and exercise. Not to mention, I really enjoy food! It tastes good! My father is a cook, the family I nanny for always cooks excellent food...and I love Chevy's mexican food, pasta, chinese...I just love food. And food apparently loves me back. So pretty much, that is how I ended up where I was before surgery. Well, it's been a full 2 weeks, I've lost 6lbs. and although excited, I also am sad that it is not more. But nothing worth having comes easy, right? Hope this touched some of you out there....and somebody feels the same as me. Let's keep our heads up!

ReneBean · 07-28-2005, 02:36 PM

Hi Y'all!

I am new - and praying that insurance will cover the cost of the band. I have already gained in the best way from this site. Thank you all!

I am fat because my mom was a kid during the depression. Her mom would leave her for weeks at a time with no money and no food. She always said that she was never able to lose the weight after I was born. (Gee, mom. Thanks for the Guilt Trip).

Top that off with Parents divorcing at at early age - and then re-marrying. Add a little disappearing Grandfather, a little domineering Grandmother, some starving children in China and Voila! You get the incredible increasing woman!

Really, looking back at all the strangeness in my life, I am just happy that Fat is my only issue.

Everybody think good thoughts about Blue Cross.

Thanks for being there!