What has been your experience with telling friends you are considering/having wls. I am not severely overweight but I am tired of losing the same weight over and over again, only to have it return plus 10 extra pounds. I know my friends will roll their eyes and think that it's an extravagance that wasn't necessary. What has been your experience and how do you handle the negative responses?
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It appears that you are looking for approval for your wls from your friends. You need to do what s good for you. One can not live their life by committe be your own person. good luck with your journey. I wish you all the best.
__________________ Sandy Beach Surgery date: 01/21/2008 1st fill 3/26/08 2.6cc's 2nd fill 05/21/08 2.0 cc's ~sweet-spot~
i told very few people initially. after the weight loss became noticable, when people would as me how i was doing it (which i think is a very prying, impolite question in the first place) i don't lie about it. and, truthfully, as some of the other folks have said, it doesn't matter what other people think. if someone were to give me their (unwanted) negative opinion, i would have to say, "well, do you really think it's better for me to weight 300 pounds and meet your expectations about HOW i should lose weight?" most of the lame-brains that express opinions like that have never faced the challenge of having to lose so much weight. i don't think they've "paid the dues" to qualify to have an opinion. (Unless they're just going to be supportive and kind.)
i say, be true to yourself. initially, tell people who will BUILD YOU UP--you've got a difficult road ahead and will need support. if you aren't SURE someone will support you, then don't expose yourself to negative people. Set yourself up for success.
i wish you well (physically, mentally, emotionally) in making this decision.
I have told very few people (the ones I knew would be supportive) that I am having the surgery. I told dh I don't want him telling his dad's side of the family at all until after the surgery because I don't wanna deal with the "are you sure you are making the right decision?" comments.
__________________
Kelly, wife to Trey and mom to Makayla.
Just starting the long process to get approved for Lap Band surgery.
June 11th - Informational Seminar; June 17th - Education Class; June 24h - PCM for referral; June 25th - Bloodwork up; June 25th - Education Class; July 7th - First Consultation with Surgeon
I tell anyone and everyone. Out in the open = nothing to hide. If people can't handle it, it's not you with whom they have issues, it is their own battles they don't want to face.
Do it for you and only you.
__________________ Banded May 15, 2008; SWCC of Nevada, Dr. Soong
Mine were all supportive, one had another friend who'd done very well with a Lap Band.
But I feel vain - I mean I have several friends who are fatter than I ever was and they dont seem the least moved to even consider surgery since I lost weight. Nobody seems to feel their weight problem is that bad, yet I felt at a BMI of 35 like an enormous cow. I was tired, clumsy, I thought I looked disgusting, I couldnt wear the clothes I wanted to and I felt middle age nipping at my heels. It really astounds me that NOBODY has quietly wanted some more info or anything. Nobody is interested, or even bothered about losing weight at all, surgery or not. Oh well.
I found that most of my friends were supportive initially. But it didn't matter to me if they were or not. I have lost both of my best friends since then. Both have "drifted" away from me, without telling me why. I suspect they are intimidated. They both used to be the "pretty one" and one friend told me she no longer was!
But I can also say that people were friends before are even closer now. I have learned you do learn who your real friends are in this experience.
Sandy Beach
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