Did you tell your Doc?

WhisperLightly · 03-30-2008, 03:56 PM

hi all. I did tell my doctor :) He didn't care at all.. he actually chuckled and said, "you know, you're the first one of my patients to ever come out to me". It was fun.

And while I don't necessarily go around advertising.. or shaking peoples hands while saying "hi my name is this and I'm a lesbian" .. I also have absolutely nothing to hide.

One day my doctor was going on and on about the pregnancy risks after surgery because you become like hyper-fertile if you've lost weight.. and I just had to interupt and tell him it just wasn't an issue ;) lol.

:D Do what feels right. If it makes them uncomfortable, then so what? They have to treat you the same regardless.

viviananna · 04-10-2008, 10:37 PM

Yes I told her. Dr. Ren was great with it. My partner of 15 years came with me for all my office visits, Dr. Ren spoke with her directly and helped her feel safe with everything.
viv

KELVINSMOM · 05-16-2008, 05:06 PM

WTF - what does a person's sexual orientation have to do with weight loss or Lap Banding? You personal business is just that - Personal . when they ask who is your support and will care for you just give a name and keep it moving.. Unless they will connect you with a special support group then i do not see why the question should arise.. Honestly, as long as your money is Green and the Docs are getting paid, I dont think they give a Rats behind!

this from a hetero mom of three.. loving ALL people with respect!

lessme · 06-05-2008, 03:38 PM

I am so glad to hear you say that. I am 57 and my partner of 14 years is my support person. I told the psych person and she seemed glad that I had someone who loved me. I am a total lipstick lesbian but I am tired of battling high blood pressure and high cholestrol. I was honest with everyone from the scheduler to the nurse, the doctor, and the billing person.

MickATL · 06-05-2008, 03:55 PM

The fact that we EXPECT people to have a problem with it or just say a name and not say they are our partner/boyfriend/girlfriend/etc. is called the "heterosexual priviledge". That str8 people can talk about their husband and that's okay. It's not considered "personal" business. Just like your user ID says you are someone's mom which could imply your str8. For me, I say it takes mental energy to try and hide parts of my life that I shouldn't have to. If you don't like it, I'll spend my money somewhere else. But our personal lives are a BIG part of how we live, who we eat with, why we overeat sometimes and an inability to be completely honest about all of those things is not healthy. Talking about our relationships, how food is involved and how we socialize around food helps us learn, evolve and grow through the weight loss surgery process.

If people don't like it, find someone who doesn't care. I don't think my surgeon needs to be gay. He just needs to be good at what he does. But me having to hide the fact that I have a boyfriend because I think he'd have a problem with it, means I wouldn't use him. In my case, I am as out loud and proud as they come and nobody ever has a problem with it. Probably because I don't.

KELVINSMOM · 06-05-2008, 05:31 PM

I hear you Mick - and maybe it is just my ignorance because I do not know what the gay community has to go through on a daily basis or how they are perceived - yes I am a heterosexual mother ( but I do have gay friends who are parents as well so the ID should not be an indication! ) - but it frustrates me to know that anyone should have to feel uncomfortable relaying their sexual orientation , religious preference , etc. .. we are all Human beings.. Period...

micountryfarm · 06-30-2008, 08:47 PM

Hello!
This subject did not come up with my Dr. I brought my partner of 10 years with me to all consults. I listed her as my spouse and put her as my power of attorney. I think it was apparent we were together, especially right before I went to surgery, she kissed me and held my hand. We were treated well and I got very good care afterward. We did laps together holding hands. I am sure we weren't the first lesbian couple they have seen.

I do agree it is not an issue that should be discussed or worried about, but alas, tis not the way of world as we know it today.

Stacey

Stacey
Barix Clinic Yipsi, MI
Dr. Schram
Lap Band
Highest weight 378
Consult: April 8, 2008
Insurance approval April 20, 2008
PAT's May 28, 2008
Surgery June 10, 2008
Before surgery 371#
After surgery 368#
Current weight 350#

rockout · 07-14-2008, 11:23 PM

I'm bi, my GP knows. He's known since I was 15. I went to him to ask to get tested for STDs (I'd started having sex and figured it was a good plan). So of course I get the safer hetero sex lecture and then he asked me about what I knew about safer sex with the same sex (um, not a lot, thats not covered in abstiance only sex ed, and frankly not an area mom is well versed in). I just kind of looked at him and he goes "Hey, its the new mellinium, I'm a with it kind of dude. Plus my son's gay, I assume nothing". So he's never had a problem with my sexuality.

I don't know if I'll tell my surgeoun or not. If it comes up, fine, if not, fine then too. I don't have a partner, my mother is my medical POA, and I'm not sure it would pertain to the surgery. Now, if it happens to come up through conversation or I'm wearing one of my rainbow things, then I won't hide it by any means.

I kind of feel, if it dosen't come up, you don't have to bring it up. Inless you really want too.

Sunwyse · 07-19-2008, 02:38 AM

People maynot have fatophobes forming lynch mobs late at night, but there are deaths related to fat-hatred. Its the suicides that happen because of the bullying and relentless teasing that goes on. It can get to a point where death seems more acceptable than to live this sort of life any longer. No, the teasers may not have pulled a trigger, but it amounts to the same thing in my mind.

Not all gay people can hide the fact wither. Some lesbians are "typical" dykes. Some gay men are stereotypical "fairies". It happens.