Sometimes I think SISTERs are over-rated!

Penni60 · 11-28-2005, 11:01 PM

OK before you all blast me, let me state my case.

I have an older, other worldly sister that lives on her own astral plain (plane-you chose). I have been through hell and back with her. She put me and my children through some rough times one weekend where I didn't know what was happening for with her for 72 hours. She was bouncing off the walls and saying her legs were making her walk. She has been diagnosed as a Manic Depressive and refuses to take her meds.

OK she is my sister and I love her. I let her live with me for about two years and believe me that was HELL. But she is my sister and I love her. Notice I keep repeating that. She is my sister and I love her.

This is just at tip of the ice berg of what I have endured being her loving sister. Not to mention what my kids have endured.

OK during the time she lived with me (by the way she lived with me to get away from her abusive hubby), she apparently was selling jewelry and doing rather well according to her last email to me. (I will get to that in a minute.) Here is where it gets good.

I am starting my own jewelry making biz (ok the cats out of the bag). I am making presents this year. I make her a beautiful Chakra Necklace with earrings to match. I send it to her. I get this email from her today.

Thank you for the jewlery. Did you use any of my stones that were at the trailor?
I was just curious because I made good money making jewlery but due to you or Amanda stealing my stones and jewlery paraphinalia I don'e make this type of jewlery anymore I am on to new and better things. I am desging clothes and making shoes out of deer and elk leather.

The trailor she refers to is when she is living with me and my children. I was floored by this email.

Now you know why I made the statement "Sometimes I think Sisters are over-rated!"

I want the damn necklace back now.

Thanks for letting me vent.

the best me · 11-28-2005, 11:07 PM

OMGosh. It's actually kind of funny, if you take a second to laugh..go ahead, re-read her e-mail from my perspective and laugh!

However, are you a bit concerned that she is in this state of mind, or astral plane/plain whichever? She is obviously not in the here and now, yes?

Oh Penni. I'm sorry this is hard for you. Write her a letter from the CIA demanding the necklace be shipped to a PO Box for investigation into the theft of the contents of the trailer. Maybe she'll mail it and and you'll get it back? LOL

vinesqueen · 11-28-2005, 11:08 PM

Well Penni, she is mentally ill, you know that but it sure doesn't make it any easier.

My younger sister won't have anything to do with me because everyone thinks I'm younger than her. It burns her up, really chapps her hide because I look younger. (she's been a smoker since she was 15, and I've never smoked.)

Penni60 · 11-28-2005, 11:14 PM

Ya know if she is on that otherworldly plain plane then she can stay there. I have bent over backward throughout all my life to help her through all this. I even helped her get the counseling she needed after the abusive marriage. Meaning I paid for it. If she wants to return my gracious gift of unconditional love with accusations then it is a sad day for her. Well and me too actually. I can't make her get the help she needs. I can only offer my sisterly love. Which I have done my entire life. And yes if she were to come to me and say she was destitute then yes I would do everything in my power to help her get on her feet. But I refuse to take the verbal abuse and accusations anymore. ENOUGH!!

I love the CIA comment. I laughed so hard at that. Thank you I needed that!

Quote:

Originally Posted by the best me

OMGosh. It's actually kind of funny, if you take a second to laugh..go ahead, re-read her e-mail from my perspective and laugh!

However, are you a bit concerned that she is in this state of mind, or astral plane/plain whichever? She is obviously not in the here and now, yes?

Oh Penni. I'm sorry this is hard for you. Write her a letter from the CIA demanding the necklace be shipped to a PO Box for investigation into the theft of the contents of the trailer. Maybe she'll mail it and and you'll get it back? LOL

piercedqt78 · 11-28-2005, 11:14 PM

I have a crazy sister as well, I guess there is one in every family. My oldest sister is totally negative about my band and weightloss (she is MO herself but not able to be banded for $$$ reasons) Then there is the middle sister, I am the baby, the middle one is on and off meds like most people are on and off diets. She calls at 4 in the morning just to talk and then says she is tired and will call later. She spends her money on video games and then calls crying that there is no food for my 9 year old nephew to eat. She battles drug addiction and mostly wins but there are times..... She has a husband that makes sure she has no money and then leaves for 8 or 10 days at a time and she puts up with this repeatedly, again calling me for money to pay for gas and food. I just don't get it. I am sorry for what you are going through, nutty sisters can be hard, you love them, but still you wish they were more sane. ~Mandy

Penni60 · 11-29-2005, 02:47 PM

OK after sleeping on this all night and wrestling with it this morning, I finally decided to call my sister and have it out.

I just got off the phone with her and she agreed what she accused me of was wrong and she apologized. We cried we laughed we forgave. We worked through a bunch of OLD issues we both had been harboring for years stemming back to when our father left us. She and Mom still have some things to deal with but all in all we worked through lots of things on the phone.

She is my sister after all. LOL!!

Thanks for letting me vent.

HeatherGurl · 11-29-2005, 03:57 PM

I am glad that you called and talked to her...
My mom and 8 of my aunts and uncles are manic depressive/bipolar. I know it is hell having someone live with you like that... but if she is like anyone in my family, they don't even know what they are doing because they aren't in their right mind.

You just keep on loving her!!!

maudeispam · 11-29-2005, 04:19 PM

I am glad things worked out for you and your sister Penni. I have one younger sister and we get along pretty good. I dont like her boyfriend, but I guess she is the one that has to live with him. But sis and I get along as well as sisters should, probably better now than we have in years.

DeLarla · 11-29-2005, 04:21 PM

Tell me you actually didn't say that only "sometimes" they are overrated. I'll trade you my delusional sister and raise you my bi-polar aunt. Fold?

That's why Slumber rules! My Slumber Sisters are the best, like sisters are supposed to be.

Penni60 · 11-29-2005, 05:45 PM

YUP I FOLD!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeLarla

Tell me you actually didn't say that only "sometimes" they are overrated. I'll trade you my delusional sister and raise you my bi-polar aunt. Fold?

That's why Slumber rules! My Slumber Sisters are the best, like sisters are supposed to be.

CandySmooch · 11-30-2005, 03:51 AM

I too have problems with my sister - we get into it pretty good a couple times a year. she's older than me and has been bossing me around and trying to run my life since I was born. Most of the time I love her and most of the time I can't stand her - most of the time we don't get along - but she is my only sister, we are blood, and we both know it and get over it. I guess its just one of those things...........but I will vent the one thing I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE is when we argue on the telephone she always hangs up on me and when I call back she hangs up on me again! That is my biggest pet peave in the world - we can argue till we're blue in the face but hanging up on anyone is the rudest thing in the world!!! Let me re-phrase that - there are reasons to hang up on a person - but yelling your side of the argument and hanging up before the other person can give their argument is just plain pushy and rude and that's what my sister does when we start fighting - she'll quickly yell her side and say something to get a rise out of me and quickly hang up! GRrrrrrrrr gets me everytime - and she's 5 years older! Come on now - we don't have to be childish and hang up - we can have a civilized argument - but I'm coming to realize she will most likely always hang up on me in those heated moments.

leatha_g · 11-30-2005, 10:36 AM

I have a beautiful sister, 6 years younger than me, who I was extremely close to in my earlier years. This girl was the golden child. Smart, pretty, had all the best friends, was the cheerleader, popular girl in our family. Valedictorian of her high school class. Could have had anything she wanted until the local baseball star introduced her to heroin. She's since been to treatment after treatment, jail, prison, more treatment, halfway houses, she's participated in activities unspeakable and certainly things she would have never been involved in before drugs entered her life. Our once golden girl is now mentally and emotionally a basket case, has hepatitis C, cannot be trusted to do anything she says, lies, steals, manipulates and has basically thrown her whole life away. I miss her. I sure could have used a good sister over all these years. I still love her and pray for her daily, but it sure is tough watching someone drown in the darkness of mental illness, drug induced dysfunctional behavior and know that there isn't a single thing you can do to change them or save them from themselves. :(

Tricia K. · 11-30-2005, 12:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by leatha_g

I have a beautiful sister, 6 years younger than me, who I was extremely close to in my earlier years. This girl was the golden child. Smart, pretty, had all the best friends, was the cheerleader, popular girl in our family. Valedictorian of her high school class. Could have had anything she wanted until the local baseball star introduced her to heroin. She's since been to treatment after treatment, jail, prison, more treatment, halfway houses, she's participated in activities unspeakable and certainly things she would have never been involved in before drugs entered her life. Our once golden girl is now mentally and emotionally a basket case, has hepatitis C, cannot be trusted to do anything she says, lies, steals, manipulates and has basically thrown her whole life away. I miss her. I sure could have used a good sister over all these years. I still love her and pray for her daily, but it sure is tough watching someone drown in the darkness of mental illness, drug induced dysfunctional behavior and know that there isn't a single thing you can do to change them or save them from themselves.

My heart goes out to you. Love is powerful but unfortunately drugs are even more powerful. I wish your sister and your family the best and hope that one day she'll heal completely and you'll have your (original) sister back. *HUGS*

ReneBean · 11-30-2005, 06:12 PM

I haven't spoken to or communicated with my younger Sister since I moved to Texas over three years ago... It always breaks my heart to be around her as she is a delusional one.... She seems normal until she starts talking about things that are owed to her and how everything was handed to me on a silver platter. She never takes responsibility for her own actions and she expects things to just land in her lap. She is honestly confused when they don't. She has never held a job for longer than 6 mos at a time because five minutes after she gets there, she is either stealing stamps (they really owe her those for the five minutes she worked off the clock) or telling the boss how they can improve a business that has been successfully operating for years before she arrived. I don't know how two women two years apart in age, raised in the same town by the same parents can be soooooo different. When I was preparing to leave the State of Oregon, I called to say goodbye - and she couldn't even spend five minutes on the phone without putting me on hold and yelling at her kids... it was sad.

I sent her a couple of e-mails when I got to TX - but her addresses were messed up because she never pays her accounts - even the free account address didn't work because her box was full. I guess I just didn't try too hard after that - and she moved (gosh, she had trouble making the mortgage payments and had to sell. shocking.) Sisters really are overrated sometimes.

DeLarla · 11-30-2005, 06:51 PM

My sister mailed my father a legal document, then attempted to coerce him into signing it. After a heated fight, she'll probably never talk to him again because he refused to sign it.

My "SISTER" has been going to a support group called NAMI (since our mother is very mentally ill.") Well, big Sis decided she wants to be Mom's legal guardian, so she thought she'd have my Dad sign a document stating my brother and I are mentally ill and she's the only competent one. She then explained how she'd send the signed document to "the judge" who would grant her guardianship. Uh, what judge? She doesn't have an attorney and is making stuff up as she goes along.

She even diagnosed me so ya'll finally know what makes DeLarla Delusional, I have Sporadic Hypertension which Distorts Emotions Generating Dishonesty and Deflection (SHDEGDD.) See, she's been "training under professionals for a month" so she's highly qualified to make such a diagnosis in addition to her new law degree! Here's a cut and paste of my dear sister's e-mail to me, which is what she tried convincing my dad of. Dad told her to POUND SAND.

(From my darling sister) "I'm currently enrolled in NAMI, the country's number one educational resource for people with chemically imbalanced family members. I started training under professors a month before mom was arrested. When questioned why I was there, in front of the class, I said to deal with and educate myself on my mother's illness, my sister's sporadic hypertension which distorts emotions generating dishonesty and deflection, and my brother's delusional narcissism."

Poor Brother Fred got such a boring disease. Lots of people have Delusional Narcissism, but I'm special. The funniest part is that my sister carries a full-length mirror from California to Las Vegas every time she comes. I have mirrors everywhere in my house, but I guess you can't see your shins or shoes (but you can see your ass from an enormous 3-way) so she brings a full length mirror when she comes to Vegas for the night. But my brother is the Narcissist, remember that.