Mourning food-venting

Okay,
I did not expect to really mourn eating food like I have been. I am 9 days post op and I am able to do mushies. However, since I am the person that normally cooks/prepares meals for the family, my DH has stepped in to make sure the family is fed. He has brought home some of the most wonderful meals. At one point I was even tempted to lick a piece of Sweet and Sour Chicken and I thought, this is sick. I still have gas pain in my shoulder and sometimes it's even hard to distinquish when I am hungry. Sometimes I think it's just regular gas pain or incision pain, but then my stomach will start growling. THIS IS INSANE!! What's wrong with me. I should be estastic that I have finally gotten this done after years of thinking about it and then all of the time I spent preparing. I am afraid this is me self sabatoging like with the other diets. I am also a little overwhelmed by the amount of weight I need to lose, which is also crazy because I have always known how much I needed to lose but it's like I was all prepared to do the work for LAP-BAND® and now I thinking I should have taken the easier/quicker way with gastric. I don't know, I think am just overwhelmed a little bit and just babbling and venting--sorry

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Oh my God, I am right there with you. Yesterday was terrible for me. I was so depressed and questioning whether I had made a huge mistake. I am 9 days post-op today and today I do feel a ton better and much more optimistic after chatting with some fellow bandsters in the chatroom. I was very depressed when I took my 8 year old through the drive thru at McDonalds last night and couldn't eat some of that delicious garbage. =) BUT, getting back to work today and having everyone tell me how much better I look already (I have lost 19 so far including my pre-op diet) and how proud they are of me for going through with the surgery has definitely helped. It does get better, or so I'm told. We are in what is referred to 'bandster hell' which is the grueling 6 weeks between sugery day and our first fill. We are HUNGRY but are still on soft/mushy diets and feel little to no restriction on the food we DO eat. It is miserable. But it does pass. We have come a long way and what we are going through is perfectly normal. Of course we are grieving food. Of course we are depressed when our families can eat anything (and they do, darn them) and we have to eat blendered mush. Just know that you are not alone and there is nothing wrong with you. You are doing great and we can only do this one day at a time.

Hi to both of you! You are in that moment of time known around here as "Bandster Hell". You can't eat, you'll hurt your surgical sites, but you are HUNGRY. The operation has happened and you're thinking "wow, what now". It will pass! Hang in there!

AND remember; how you conduct the rest of your journey is up to YOU. Many people find they can still eat just about any foods even after restriction, and many do just that! How you eat will be in your control, and your choice. You may do an "atkins" type low carb low fat diet, you may do a "WW" type or other calorie counting diet, or you may thrive by eating the same foods as your family, only WAY WAY less, opting to keep the junk to a minimum occasional treat.

So you don't have to mourn your food. You can miss it a little but it's not gone for good. You won't eat it in the same quantity as before, but that's what you signed on for!

Keep your spirits up. It's worth it, and you have more choice and control than you realize. It really isn't a DIET, so don't let yourself start feeling that way. You'll heal, and your choices will be almost endless. :)

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PCM 7/3/08 Seminar 7/10/08
Upper Gi, Psych,Nutrition, Surgeon 7/25
Tricare Approved 7/31
1st surgery 8/11 thick liver no band
Banded 8/29/08!!! BY:
Dr. Sonny Cavazos, Texas Bariatric

Hi Rachel...I'm in Richmond VA too. Do you mind telling me who did your surgery?

Thanks,
Molly

i know how you feel i was the same way i was so mesirable i just cried like a baby , but guess what! when the weight started coming off i was so happy, but still hungry ,just looking at the scale and knowing that i was loosing pounds made me feel better and i was able to go with the flow so hang in there ! there will be better days ahead , it doesnt bother me as much now when i have to prepare meals for my famliy. keep you chin up and the fork down....

Thread Starter

Thanks guys. It really helps alot when you have someone out there that not only responds, but, understand what you are going through.

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I mourned food (especially fast food) and I was miserable.

• I have learned to be very creative with my pureed food.
• I try to walk or exercise when it is not time to eat or when others are eating
• Water Water Water
• I bought a food diary and a very good calorie/protein/carb counter book. It is amazing how many calories are in the foods I used to eat. No wonder I was fat!

I have posted this on other sites, but I will share with you:

Oh my! I just made the most awesome protein shake.
Pumpkin Spice Protein shake:
(sorry, I didn't measure the ingredients)
1 scoop of vanilla protein powder
about 2 TBS of Vanilla yogurt
Some canned pumpkin
Splash of milk
Pack of Splenda
Cinnamon
Ice
Blend to perfection!

So creamy and yummy!!

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Humana (doesn't cover) and Tricare Insurance
Tricare denied! Appealed and reversed!
Surgery September 30th
First fill Nov 5th 1cc (total of 4 cc in band) Highest=233/preop=220/present=163