Help! off to a bad start!!!

soulful Grandma · 07-28-2007, 01:32 PM

Hi,

I badly need some advice and also some reassurance. I was banded 5/14. I did ok for the first 3 weeks while healing. Then, at the 3 week point, it was like I turned ravenous! Like when you come off a starvation diet like optifast. My surgeon kind of said that I'd be able to eat anything, and boy he was right. I went back to my old ways, almost. I'm getting plenty (50-70 gr or more) of protein, and at least 8 glasses of water a day but it doesn't seem to help with the hunger. Got my first fill at 6 weeks (1 cc in a 4cc band) - still no difference. Got my 2nd fill (1/2 cc) 3 weeks later and while I now have some "sticking" if I don't chew carefully, I am still hungry and can eat as much as ever, and pretty much anything. I'm being careful not to lean toward soft food. I've gone into a real spiral of depression and self-hate with all this, and of course there goes the exercise and any other good habits, and here comes the emotional eating. I started avoiding this forum. The support group only meets once a month and seems to be mostly RNY patients. I've regained 4 of the 12 or so pounds that I lost after surgery. Not much but in the wrong direction!

I'm so surprised by all this. No one could have been more ready for this surgery, or so I thought. I went to therapy, researched it for 2 years, went to seminars, the whole bit. I really thought this was the tool I needed to help me with obesity. I was dieting, losing, seeing the nutritionist, and SO ready! I was 100 % committed to this.
The Surgeon and his PA just keep saying be patient, the restriction will come. And not to worry about the pouch being stretched or band slipped, that I am fine. My therapist says, be patient it will come and stop the self-flagellation. But every time I see the commercial about taming the hunger lion I want to throw something at the tv!! I never, ever expected that I would get off to this bad a beginning.

Can someone please tell me that it isn't too late to turn it around? Can anyone relate to my experience, and the let down I'm feeling? I'm leaving tomorrow for a business trip, but when I come back I'll log on immediately, promise.
I'd really love more than anything to hear from some folks who turned this thing around. :help::help::help::help::help::help::help::help::help::help::help:

Jeni 85 · 07-28-2007, 02:26 PM

Your restriction is probabyl not at that "sweet spot" yet... dont be discouraged... i know that for a month straight the scale would stick to the weight of 252-254... i was so disappointed.. I then decided i needed a fill.. as soon as i went for another fill and worked out it worked... Just stayed motivated... Oh by the way if your having those evil sugars (i was so guilty of this) you'll only want more so try to avoid them.. It took me three times to hit my sweet spot and soe others it took longer... remember each and everyones' body is different so we all have different fill levels.

GOOD LUCK!!!! AND REMEMBER YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!:clap2::whoo:

if you need support you got this board and feel free to message me on here anytime. (i am on here almost everyday) :p

soulful Grandma · 07-28-2007, 02:56 PM

Jeni,

Thank you so much for those words of encouragement. I'm looking forward to my next fill and (trying!) not to beat myself up. I hear you about the sugars - I hope you are saying that avoiding them does eventually help the cravings? I'll definitely message you and please you do the same. I don't know why I didn't get back on the board before...

lizrbit · 07-28-2007, 03:22 PM

soulful,
i was so right where you are too. They call it "bandster hell", and it refers to the space of time post banding, but pre significant restrictive fill. I was there for months. I even GAINED ten lbs during that time.... It just goes with the territory. My surgeon does my fills and when i went in this last time, id kept up excercise but my appetite was still alot. I kept track with FitDay - Free Weight Loss and Diet Journal its a free online thing where you log your food in, and it really does help. It helps you see what you really eat.
But this last fill really did it. When he walked in he said, "so i see you can eat a 10 oz steak, how would you like for us to make that a 4 oz steak and you still feel satisfied?" and of course i said yes and this last fill put me at perfect restriction. Im at my all time low now and hoping to bring it down further before i go back in for checkup. it gets easier with the fills. theres No way of getting around it and its nothing you can plan for, you just have to get your fills as they are scheduled and wait until you get restriction. You will KNOW when you are there. If anything i worry now that im too tight. I cant eat anything in the mornings at all, usually until one pm. then im okay as long as i dont push it. Youll know when that happens too.
KEEP PLUGGING ALONG...keep your excercise up (i dont have a gym in town, but i ride a bike in the mornings first thing, and walk in evenings after dinner) and track your food intake (try the fitday thing its free and it does keep you accountable) and keep your fill appointments! also dont be afraid to tell your doctor you want an agressive fill. You will get there sooner than you think.

Dont give up. you will get there.

**Jack** · 07-28-2007, 06:02 PM

....my own Bandster Hell isn't from outrageous hunger....because I really haven't had that much of it....what I have is a state of NOT having the sensation of being like a shark that has to constantly swim forward to get oxygen over the gills....I no longer have to eat my way thru stuffing whatever comes along down the conveyor belt to the stomach pit for processing before being added to my butt and thighs and belly and arteries etc......

The realization that I could be 'hungry' without being 'ravenous' and I could eat to satiety without eating as if planning the winter seige of Leningrad..

And exactly what is it that always made ME eat maximum portions even with the smallest of a twinge of hunger???

The issues we Bandsters must deal with effectively, one way or another, is to connect that actual 'hunger means eat' while 'NON hunger means STOP'.....

This one step alone has freed me of many moments of dietetic depravity...

I am convinced, that if eating does not satisfy our hunger....then physical hunger is not what we are trying to feed....

I spent much of my personal time beating myself up over similar eating behavior. It was not an effective tool in producing changed behavior.

It was not the food that was the issue. For me it was finding the CAUSE of the eating behavior that has helped.

I had a 40 year history of failed diets, hypnotism, medications, etc.....
each was of limited help for a brief time.

I finally sought help on the causal plane....and that shark-frenzy eating behavior has left the building.....

soulful Grandma · 07-28-2007, 06:10 PM

thank all of you from the bottom of my heart. You each gave me hope with your responses - you all told me something that I needed to hear. I am going to print your responses to take with me on my business trip and keep them near to re-read when the going gets tough. Bless you a thousand times, Lizrbit, Jack and Jeni 85. I have lots of support but NO ONE knows what I'm going through, except you.

pjrugby · 07-28-2007, 06:21 PM

Hi soulfull grandma.
you are not alone !!!!!! i had my op in may. lost a bit of weight, then put it nearly all back on.. had my first fill.. nothing ! so put more back on !! talk about disappointment.. !!!!!!! i know exactly how your feel !!!! i had my second fill 2 days ago. and i can feel something. not sure what, but was really hard to swallow chicken. kinda got a lump deep down in my throat.
i love this site, i learn so so so much from it.. i have not found my hospital very useful at all, and infact they just make me feel worse as i put my weight back on and feel like more and more of a failure and they appear more and more surprised that the scales go up !!
i am just hoping the funny feeling i have is the start of restriction ?? not sure, i cant still eat a whole bowl of bran flakes.. ?? Its so tough ,, i just want to get this sweet spot everyone talks about. its so tough being patient !! because for me, there is a nagging feeling that it won't ever work..
i wish you lots of luck, and am sending encouragment. and a little nag to get down the gym :) .. i went today for the first time in almost 2 weeks, so am feeling smug. te he .
x

soulful Grandma · 07-28-2007, 06:29 PM

Wishing YOU lots of luck too, PJRugby! I do think that lumpy feeling is the beginning of restriction ....at least mine got "lumpier" after the second fill... I can still eat as much as ever though. If you weren't in the UK I'd think we had the same treatment team! they are entirely too casual about it, partly because they are trying to fit in a million patients a day! I wish us all the best and thanks for the nudges to the gym. I'd like to keep in touch with you all.

MissNilsa · 07-28-2007, 06:31 PM

I have not been banded but my friend went through the same thing you went through. it will pass, is all I could tell you. A lot of folks in this forum explain the same thing. I've seen it quite a bit. don't stress out, just go with the flow and try to keep your mental part responsible because that part is really always up to you.

Dibaby · 07-29-2007, 07:37 PM

This is the way it was explained to me. Anything you loose before getting at least 2 fills look at it as a bonus. Don't expect to loose anything..and yes you can even gain. When you finally hit your sweet spot the light bulb will go off and it'll all make sense as to how this darn thing works. But really each fill I have had..it was a new re-learning experience as to how to work with the band. You'll get there. On average from what I can tell..most people get around 4 fills. So if your not feeling like you have good restriction, don't worry it just takes some time. Good luck and keep posting.

Remember this isn't a race. You'll get there

GayleTX · 07-29-2007, 11:56 PM

Have you eliminated all the white carbs? Doing that will help you with the cravings....keeps your blood sugar from bouncing and making you feel hungry when you really are not. Also, finding some protein shakes that you love (nd there are good ones out there) helps satisfy the need for sweets and trets.

Another fill or two and you wll be under control. Stay strong!!

soulful Grandma · 08-04-2007, 11:44 AM

Thanks everyone for the help. I just got home from my business trip and I printed and took your responses with me to read at night. I'll try the white carbs thing, I started out not eating any but slowly they re-entered my diet... I welcome your suggestions on protein shakes. I have found only the Atkins ready-to-drink ones to be really palatable so far. I do drink some of the cocoas, fruit drinks, etc. But all that I've tried so far range from horrible to just ok.

I go for a fill next week, the 3rd one, so keep your fingers crossed for me.......... Blessings to you all, this is the ONLY place I have found real support.

musicalmomma · 08-04-2007, 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by soulful Grandma

Thanks everyone for the help. I just got home from my business trip and I printed and took your responses with me to read at night. I'll try the white carbs thing, I started out not eating any but slowly they re-entered my diet... I welcome your suggestions on protein shakes. I have found only the Atkins ready-to-drink ones to be really palatable so far. I do drink some of the cocoas, fruit drinks, etc. But all that I've tried so far range from horrible to just ok.

I go for a fill next week, the 3rd one, so keep your fingers crossed for me.......... Blessings to you all, this is the ONLY place I have found real support.

Have you tried the EAS AdvantEdge? I personally like them A LOT better than the Adkins shakes...they have 17 grams protein and 4 carbs. Not too shabby and I personally LOVE the chocolate flavor.

Your story is as if I had written it my self...only I was banded a couple of weeks after you. I was SO down on myself when I went for my 6 week check up, having GAINED a couple of pounds! My surgeon was so kind about it...he shrugged and said "Hey! That's not too bad!" Then he looked me right in the eye and said "Remember, I told you that you'd HAVE to be patient. You don't have a fill yet and it may take from 3-6 fills before we reach the sweet spot. Be patient, you're doing great!"

His words were exactly what I needed to hear. I got a 1cc fill and still have VERY LITTLE restriction...but I'm back on the exercise wagon and REALLY trying to restrict all junk food. It's working because I'm losing again...slowly, but it's going in the right direction.

You're back on track...keep coming to the board and getting that support. This board has been VITAL to keeping me motivated!

soulful Grandma · 08-11-2007, 09:08 AM

Hi, a bit of an update to the most supportive group ever!

I had my 3rd fill 2 days ago. I now have 2 ccs in a 4 cc band. I may be feeling the tiniest bit of restriction, so subtle that I'm not even sure. I sure hope so as I go out of town again on Wednesday. Maybe chasing the grandkids will help, that's how I'll spend about half of my vacation so that my son and his DW can get a break. The only time they get one is when we are in town about every 3 mos. b/c they don't trust anyone else with the kids yet.

I keep re-reading all of your words and it helps keep me going. 5 weeks till the next fill. I'm trying much harder to eliminate the white carbs and add fiber, maybe that will help. Now if I can just find a way to murder the "night-eating monster" AND the "chocolate monster" and stop dreading the exercise.

Thanks for helping me on my emotional roller coaster - please don't give up on me!

Oh, I am in therapy too, I think that is quite necessary! Love to you all.