swinging High

I'm now higher than not, but not yet high enugh to do more testing.

It's sort of facinating, in a Dr. Spock sort of way, to watch every mood, every physical symptom, charting it to determine where I am. Sometimes I wonder if people are really supposed to be so in-touch with our bodies, and othertimes I wonder why everyone isn't so in-touch.

The last two weeks have been physically difficult. I've been in a low, but thankfully not as low as I was in June. No adreanal failure, knock on wood, but I was very low nonetheless. The last couple of days I've had terrible kidney pain, an 8.5 or 9 on the 10 painscale. I suppose I should have called Dr. L, but I didn't. I'm so tired of doctor visits, I want a normal life. But I have no idea what that is like. I remember when I was in my 20's that I had so much energy, so much ... life. I can only hope that the headaches stop once I have the pit surgery.

This morning when I got up my face was very puffy. My eyes looked like I have a bad case of poison oak, which in a very weird and twisted way is a good thing because it lets me know that I'm going to be a screaming maniac soon. The bruise from my last accupuncture treatment still hasn't healed, but then again, I am not really expecting it to since it's only been a week.

I have the will to do things, which is another sign that I'm heading high. Yay! But unfortuantely, I don't have the stamina. The lows leave me so weak. I'ts like I have Addison's on top of the Cushings, which is all part of the magic of Cyclical Cushings. I either have too much or not enough. Overdose of cortisol or withdrawl from it, with now a week or so in the middle where I feel somewhat normal.

I've done a few load of laundry today, which is great for several reasons, the least of which is that I need clean panties!;) The key is to not over do, which is such a delicate balance. When I feel good I want to do all the things that I don't have the energy to even think about when I'm low.

I suspect I have a CSF leak, which considering I haven't had the surgery is a bad thing. Well, a CSF leak is never a good thing, ever. Last month while we wer in Seaside I had the leaky feeling, and again on Sunday. It just isn't normal to have your nose suddenly leak when you bend over. It usually happens when my headaces are at their worst, and then I'll do something like bend over to pick something up off the floor, or I'll sweep up something into a dustpan... and then I'll feel something tear loose and my nose will run. It doesn't taste like snot, sort of salty and bitter. Again, it's weird to be so in-touch with my body that I know when the flavor of my snot is wrong.

So, the wather is supposed to be getting hot, just in time for me to be heat intolerant. Funny how that works. Oh well, it will all to my stress.