Step Away From The Box - will I ever learn

What is it about carbs? I know I need them, but it is a fine line beween need and NEED!

My tooth broke two weeks ago and I had to get a crown, back molar. Turns out I had a huge cavity that didn't show on the X-Ray and the tooth just gave way. I am lucky, they say, it didn't break down the middle. I am not a "good" patient, I sweat, almost jump out of my skin. I HATE THE DENTIST. In the middle of my "fix" the novacaine quit working, turns out I am hypersensative. Dentist numbed me again, almost my entire face was numb and my tounge didnt' work properly. I had warning to be careful, it might be sensative, and don't mess with the temp crown. For that much money, even with insurance, I hope it was made of gold! And after, well I put the liquid vicodine to good use!

So now two weeks later, I find I was eating mush and lots of cereal. Went back Saturday and he took the temp crown off. I was still embarrased from two weeks ago, so I didn't ask to be numbed up. The Dentist asked how I felt, and I told him it was a little sensative. He poked around a bit and then blew air onto the tooth. OH MY GOD - you would have though he was drilling. The pain was so bad. I took in a huge breath cried out and started sweating. The pain was throbing and I was wishing I could run away. I didn't move or breathe hoping air not moving over the tooth would make it better. IT DIDN'T!!! IT HURT LIKE HELL! So more numbing crap, another numb face, but not as bad and he was able to finish.

Went home and hit the VICODINE again. My face throbbed, my tooth hurt and it HURT. AFter the numbing was gone, I went straight to my comfort. CARBS - I ate a box of cereal yesterday. A whole fricking box. Now I didn't eat it all at once, but nibbled the rest of the day.

I woke up this am, swollen and retaining water. I felt like hell and I knew what it was, that fricken cereal. My tooth felt better, but I had a Carb Hangover.

Then I stepped on the scale. A week of self pitty had taken it's toll. The scale moved up a couple pounds. My worse nightmare.

Well today I put a stop to the self pitty. I made a protien drink with Rice Milk, Egg White (did you know it was pasterized), Coco Powder (for baking) and Truvea - artificial sweetner. Now I found out, there is such a thing as too much Coco Powder, so I shall cut back next time, but all in all it wan't too bad.

I will not allow myself to go back. I will not do this to myself again!

Want to know the difference this time? It was only a couple pounds - not 10, 20 or 50. 2 or 3 and the breaks get set. More exercise and no more snacking on cereal. It wasn't the band that stopped me. It was me,

Maybe I am learning after all. I maybe a "slow" learner, but it is definately registering. Maybe I need a fill too, you know a little top off, but maybe the ghosts of the past are really in the past, where they belong.

So next time, STEP AWAY FROM THE CEREAL box, maybe I'll have some turkey instead.