Here is a little picture update. It is possible with lap band and a lot of hard work. First photo is pre surgery, second photo is May 2011, third photo is this week May 2012.
Some days I find it hard to believe when I look in the mirror that this is really me! ;-)

I haven't blog in few weeks or months, but wanted to let everyone know I am still out here, reading the blogs and forums to keep up with everyone. I spend more time on MFP these days. I started working out with a personal trainer 5 weeks ago and that is really working out good for me. I had really hit a slump in my program and was pretty much dead in the water again. My band was working, but I just wasn't eating very well. I had hit a spot again when food just wasn't my focus and was eating way to few calories. My trainer told me I was pretty much starving my muscles and my body was holding on to those fat cells for dear life. Sad I had to pay someone to teach me how to eat, but it is working. At first I thought there is no way I can do this. I am suppose to eat 3 meals a day and that is it. But guess what 5 weeks later, I am eating my 3 meals a day but I am supplementing a protein shake twice a day for snacks and most days take in 100 plus grams of protein. I still have my days I struggle but they are fewer and further between. My first month I lost 5lbs and 9 inches. I am hoping to lose 4 lbs this month and I will finally be out of the 150's.. While what a mile stone, I have not been this petite since high school. I used to think a goal of 132 was unreachable but I am finding out if you have the right attitude you can make anything work. Now don't get me wrong I have my ups and downs with the band but for the most part this is the best thing I every did for me. And seriously it really is all about me at this time. This is my chance, my time and my journey. Lap band is not an easy journey, it is paved with trials and tribulations. It will test your passion, it will test your commitment, you will have to fight temptation on a daily basis. There will always be food and lots of it, you have to realize that food to you is no different than alcohol is to an alcoholic or drugs are to a drug addict. My journey has consisted of distancing myself from temptations, I do not allow certain foods in my house or more specifically in my cabinets or fridge. I have no control of what others do but I do have control over what I put in my mouth. I find my self more aware of what others eat and I often think, man I used to eat like that and look where it got me. I think now my goal has become an obsession, I work my butt off, 3 days with a trainer, 6 days a week of cardio and logging religiously every morsel I eat. I have a new set of fears now, I used to fear not losing weight, my new fear is how will I maintain? I am trying to make exercise routine and part of my life.

To all you newbies and those weighting to have surgery and lose of you who are struggling, stay positive, stay focused and if you detour, forgive yourself, pick you up and move forward. We can all get caught up in the soulda, coulda, woulda! Look at everyday as a new beginning. Good luck to all of you and if you know a nurse be extra special to them this week, this is our week to celebrate. It is national nurse week, so hug your favorite nurse this week and tell her how much you appreciate what she does.

In advance I will ask your forgiveness as i rant about my life!

I haven't blogged in a while but I have been busy and still consistent to my goal. I started working with a trainer 2 weeks ago to learn to properly exercise and EAT.
Eat you say, I thought that was why you had lapband surgery so you wouldn't eat. Well the answer to that question is both a yes and a no. I had lapband surgery because I had always failed at every weight loss program for 20 years plus. I like many would always lose weight but could never make it for the long haul not did I ever really change my relationship with food and what I put into my body. I have always been in for the instant gratification, quick fix and results category. I think I have tried almost every fad diet on the market and have always made them work for me only to gain back what I lost plus MORE! Does this sound familiar to any of you, I am sure it does and I am sure that many of you have been as frustrated as I have been.
So why is this Lapband Journey going to be any different? What will I do different and how will I transition this into a life style change and will I be successful?

A Journey:The act of traveling from one place to another; a trip. A distance to be traveled or the time required for a trip: a 2,000-mile journey to the Pacific; the three-day journey home. A process or course likened to traveling; a passage: the journey of Life!

Hmmmmm, after reading the above statement I think I need to rethink what I call this Lapband process. A journey may be OK to get from Fat to Thin but then what? I am thinking that, the closer you get to goal the more you need to have made some major changes a long this journey. So now I am refocusing my thoughts and think I will call this Lapband a "Life Style Change". If I really want to commit to this weight loss I have to change my way of thinking, my band has been my safety net under this high wire act, that I have been using to prevent my self from falling off. It has worked, I have been successful but I am getting close to my goal, a number I set that I wanted to achieve and would consider my success. Wow this is really scary, can I do this? Can I really be successful? Can I really maintain this new me and how do I do it? So, to remain focused I really have to get my mind heading down the right path, I need reprogramming. I need to really understand my body and how food is used as fuel. Some days it all seems so over whelming and you almost feel OCD. You critique every morsel you allow to go between your lips, you constantly tell yourself, no don't eat that, no you can't have that. Now how many calories are in that and how much protein have I eaten and oh my god have I eaten to many carbs or what the hell do I do if I really am hungry. Sound familiar. My brain is constantly in high gear, constantly planning, evaluating and second guessing if I am really eating the right things or if I am just going through the motions. Honestly I do not want to feel deprived for the rest of my life. Some day I want to be able to eat some type of dessert and not feel like I have failed or let my self down. Someday I want to have a healthy relationship with food not a fear that if I eat something it will tip me one way or the other. There has got to be a balance between healthy and happy.

I have went through some months lately as I sat stalled at the same weight day after day and wondered, why? I have obsessed over my food dairy, I have obsessed over my carbs, my fats. I have tried to only eat 3 meals a day and never snack between meals. I have honestly tried to follow every rule that my doctor and the Lapband web site has suggested. But honestly, it's hard, it's not natural, it sometimes sets you up for failure. It makes you resent food, it makes you resent other people who are losing faster than you and it makes you feel like a failure. Honestly following the Lapband rules, is not really eating a well balanced diet.(I will add in my opinion) I have struggled since I had this procedure to incorporate fruits and vegetables in my diet. I rarely eat fiber and my focus has always been protein, protein and more protein. I know, I know, your all saying but you have lost weight, yes but have I always been satisfied with my diet and what I was eating the answer was NO, or hell NO!

So world since this can no longer be just about the journey and more about living a healthy life. I am not committed to making a life style change. How scary is that, and how in the world do I do it. Big question with no simple answers. So I will enlighten you to my plan.

As I stated in my first sentence, I started working out with a trainer two weeks ago. I was very upfront with him, "Justin". I told him about my WLS and how I was suppose to eat with lapband and what I could and could not eat. The first session we had he told me, "You are not eating healthy and you are not eating enough" Well that was a first for me, I have always been told I eat to much. He also told me I was not burning fat, I was burning muscle, due to my poor nutritional habits. Oh great! Now what, I have spent the past 15 months trying to eat healthy only to go to far in the other directions. Geezzz!! I am starving my body of necessary nutrients. Am I ever going to get the hang of this. So here we go again, planning meals, making sure I am taking time to get in my planned healthy snacks, increasing my protein, adding some carbohydrates, more veggies and let's don't forget the fruits. That day last week when I walked out of the gym, I thought to myself, how the hell am I going to do this. I can't eat rice, I can't eat sweet potato's and oatmeal with egg whites, protein drinks and on and on.... Well it is one week later and I am finding if you put your mind to it you can do just about anything. I have stuck to his plan, I have increased my calories back to 1200 plus, I have managed to get from 90-120 gms of protein in every day. I have managed to learn to like Oatmeal with egg whites, I have learned to eat rice again (only a quarter of a cup but it is rice. I have learned to like sweet potato's without butter and brown sugar and managing to get at least one serving of fruit in and some vegetables. Now granted some days I feel like all I get done is prep my meals and I feel like I am always eating but honestly I feel better, have more energy and actually have the strength to exercise and do the weight training he wants to do. I have been able to increase my cardio workouts to 30 minutes daily with a goal of 45.

So bottom line, I am trying to change my lifestyle, I am learning to plan my meals better and make exercise a routine in my life not just something I do to reach a goal. Honestly for me the only difference in LapBand from the old diet is I am forcing myself to live healthy. The band is not causing me to live healthy because honestly the band will allow you to eat all the unhealthy food you want, it is you and only you that can control what and when you put food in your mouth, The band can restrict you, can make you throw up can lead you to an unhealthy life style if you allow it to. You still have to get control over your life, get rid of bad habits and develop new habits. You have to remember that it truly is and will always be only a tool, it will never control or help you decide what you should eat only you can make those decisions and only you will know what you put in your body.

This is much more than a journey, it is my war on food and health, it is me becoming a "New Person". So if I become obsessive about what I eat and how much I exercise so be it because I am in this for the long haul and I will not fail and I will reach goal, maybe not today or tomorrow but it will happen if I continue to change my behaviors.

So fellow bandster, don't give up, take each new challenge as it comes and most and foremost believe in yourself and believe that with hard work, focus, support and love you can make this.........

Lifestyle Change: modifying or eliminating long-held habits of eating or physical activity and maintaining the new habits over months and years!!

We can all do this, because I believe.........................................

Well guys it is almost Friday and I don't know about all of you but I am so thankful. It has been one hectic week here in SC. Today and yesterday are my first two days in weeks that I have managed to get all my protein in, now that being said, it is only because I am making myself drink one protein shake a day. I have not exercised like I should, I made a decision not to go back to curves. It just isn't working for me. Last week I went twice and when I went on Thursday I was in one of my moods (someone at work pissed me off) and I over exercised and got my other knee hurting. You would think I would learn but for some reason I have to do everything the hard way. I have been debating something for weeks and finally made a decision today and a commitment. I was talking with a friend at work about needing a trainer, someone to help me focus on my problem areas, show me how to work out effectively one on one. I told her about a local place I had contacted but was frustrated because they had not returned my calls. The nerve, you have a business and don't return calls. She gave me the guys name and number and I called him. Well he said he would take me on as a client if I was willing to listen to him, monitor my eating habits and commit myself to 90 minutes of cardio 3 times a week. I laughed when he said, would you be willing to eat healthy. You see, at first I didn't tell him I had, had WLS, I wanted to feel him out to see what he was going to recommend. He told me now you will have to eat a lot of protein, oh yeah I know about that. You need to cut back on your carbohydrates, no problem there, they don't go down. I would need to give up sweets and snacking, ditto already done that. So next week I start, I am both excited and nervous. It is going to cost me $25 a session but I am going to give it a month and see how it goes, I don't have to sign a contract so if it doesn't work out I am not out anything but my time and some money. I have a point I want to prove, which I know is probably ridiculous at my age, I want to see how much I can actually tighten up. I don't want to have surgery to tighten up my skin I want to tighten as much as I can with exercise. I know this may be totally impossible but I gotta try and I feel that a few months with a trainer is cheaper than surgery and less risky. I know you don't ask but my main problem area is my inner thighs. I have given up on having boobs, too old to care and that is why there is Victoria Secrets, push'em up and make them look like their big. ;-)
Think that's all for now, so a big cheers to all of us who are working our boom-booms off. (I also ordered the Brazilian butt video work out today from beach body, I thought it could keep P 90x company on the self.)

Well it has been a few weeks since I have posted. Nothing really exciting going on in my life. Still sitting at 158 lbs. It seems every time I get a fill I have an immediate drop in weight and than plateau again on the scales and start losing inches. I had my measurements done 3 weeks ago and next Saturday will be measurement day again, so we will see. I know I don't need a fill because I am not hungry between meals and barely eat 1000 calories a day. I have been working really hard on drinking the water and making sure I get all of my protein in. I only went to Curves once last week but did some distance walking. My other knee started acting up, last Tuesday I had a really bad day and work and went to curves and took it out on the machines but instead I think the machines took it out on me. So I have decided to look at alternative gyms and find a personal trainer to help me lose this last 26 lbs. I contacted a local gym here in my area and they charge 35 dollars a session with a 175 dollar planning assessment and nutrition plan. The training sessions are usually once per week and you have access to the gym 7 days a week. Has anyone else ever used a trainer and does this seem like the going rate. I know I should be happy with my weight to date but some days I just find it depressing to work so hard at eating healthy and nothing happens. You would think being this far post op I would get over myself and just be happy with my results to date. I think this is the time when I usually sabotage myself and say, "oh what the hell you might as well eat what you want your not losing anyway." This is when I thank god for my band because it makes me think before I act. I am still liking my Fitbit, it does make me very much aware of how much I move during the day and today I have not been moving. Took the day off from work, feeling a little under the weather. The wonderful GI bug going around at work and it has not been a very pleasant 24 hours. Lap band and GI Bug do not mix well. Enough for now, keep you post on what I do about the trainer and the gym. Just not sure about the cost.

Happy Hump Day everyone! Hope everyone is having a wonderful week. I have been enjoying my new electronic toy, the FitBit to track my steps, a pedometer on steroids I will call it. I am finding it as obsessive as logging all my food on myfitnesspal. I do find it more rewarding to do the exercise when I can actually measure it accurately and record the numbers. Tomorrow is my 4 week follow up from my last fill, it is actually 5 weeks and I get weighed. I rarely weigh myself at home because the scales can vary so much so I will be excited to know where I am. I still think I am a little tight because I still find it difficult to get all my food in and I rarely fill hungry. I am only able to eat about 1/2 cup at each setting so I have been eating at least 1 snack per day to add some protein and calories. My regular MD did reduce my blood pressure meds on Monday to have the dosage so this was a hugh milestone. I have been on top dosages on my BP meds and asthma meds for several years. This was great news and a great milestone for me. My never be totally off but this is still great. Everyone keep up the good work, we will all make this journey. Believe in your self and you will succeed. Happy Wednesday and talk to ya later!

Thanks for allowing me to rant earlier today but i have been having a lot of bad days lately with eating solids and I just needed to vent. I had a yummy dinner tonight of solid foods and it all went down and it felt good to eat. Drinking only protein makes me grumpy sometimes and I knew you guys would understand. I bought my Fit Bit today and have set it up, I am really excited to wear it to work this coming week and to exercise. It will be interesting to compare how much I burn all day during my daily activity and how much more I can do. Hope everyone has a great week.

Hope everyone is having a great weekend and a wonderful relaxing Sunday. The day is beautiful here in SC, sun is shinning but it is still a little cool for the south. I don't know about everyone else but I can't wait until spring. I have so much more energy and motivation when it is warm outside. I find the winter months to be a little depressing and I do not feel as motivated to be outside and exercise. I am proud that I have went back to curves a week ago and have met my goal of going on Saturday mornings, and Tuesday and Thursday evenings after work. I need to set a new goal this week of at least doing 30 minutes of exercise daily of at least walking or something. I need my tread mill moved so I can use it, my son moved in late last year and it is in his room and a little hard to use. My husband says he has to take it apart to get it out of the room and has not done that yet. First thing that ticks me off lately. I go back to see my surgeon next week one , I had my last fill on Jan 30th and I am still struggling with solid foods most days, I do eat but it is usually late in the afternoons and evenings, I am getting all my protein in but with supplements. I keep thinking the band will loosen up a little and some days it seems to and others like yesterday, I just gave up and ate Greek yogurt and drank protein. I am still holding at 160 lbs, so at least I have slowed down on losing for a while. On the 30th I was at 175 which was up 5 lbs from before Christmas. I did find something good to eat this weekend, we ordered take out from the local Chinese restaurant and I ate a tofu stir fry, it was yummy and the tofu was silky soft and slide right down. I was only able to eat about 1/2 cup but it was yummy. I went out today and purchased a fit bit and tied it to my fitness pal account so I could track my activity and calories burned. I will let everyone know how that works out. I have been a little lazy lately and feeling a little frustrated with food and eating in general. I haven't felt this way in a long time but it is just so frustrating when one day things go down with out problems and they same things don't the next day. Welcome to bandster hell, I guess. The last thing that ticks me off today is people who use this site to promote sales of products. I was reviewing the forums and blogs this morning and found a blog that someone had started yesterday, she said she was 2 years out from lap band and had lost 150 lbs but was promoting a protein drink diet to get back on track. I thought to my self, every lap band patient knows that gimmicks don't work, diets don't work and getting the lap band has to be about changing your life and behaviors. Not sure why it pissed me off but it did, I feel we all work so hard on trying to live with lap band and trying to change out lives and live like others and the last thing I needed was someone telling me I could lose weight with lap band drinking yummy protein shakes. SERIOUSLY! I drink the damn shakes because nothing else goes down some days and this is not how I intend to lose my last pounds. I want to eat, enjoy my food portion. So shame on you if you are a lap band patient for encouraging us to drink protein to lose weight instead of change our behaviors and learn to live with lap band. I know we all have the freedom to post and believe what ever we want but SERIOUSLY give me a break. Ok, I feel better now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Those of you who have been following my blog know I am a bit of geek and sometimes spend countless hours researching ways to help myself to stay focused and be successful. I do believe there is no magic to weight loss and actually hate the word DIE..T and have removed it from my vocabulary. I do believe that being successful with Lap Band does require a life style change in eating habits and rewiring of my brain to help me to make healthy choices. I try very hard not to put myself in situations that would require me to be around junk food or foods that are not good for me. I am fully aware that only being 1 year post op and still having weight to lose to get to goal makes me vulnerable to all the horror stories of regaining what I have lost. I know the fat person still lives in the shadows and watches and waits for a weakness in my armor. I know I must be strong and must learn to live the healthy life style, by always picking the best food choices, exercising daily and always practice what I preach. I sometimes tell myself it is ok to still be overweight because I do look much better than I did a year ago but my fear is that as long as I stay overweight it will be just as easily to accept being obesity again. If I am totally honest this journey will continue for the rest of my life, because once the journey of weight loss ends than the journey of maintaining everything I have worked so hard for starts. So today on my internet travels I found a bairitric physicians web site who has published several books and one happened to be a free down load. "The Last 30 Pounds". I started reading and decided I needed to share this with all of my LapBand Family because at some point in time we will all be here and it doesn't hurt to read ahead. I know just reading a book doesn't make it happen but if you read and apply it can work. I need goals and rules, goals help me to keep focused and true to my journey. I also read several other things on this physicians web site about the yoyoing of fills and unfills and it actually made since to me. This physicians web site is one of the best I have ran onto while inquiring on success of Lap Band Patients. Here is the site and also the free down load of the "Last 30 Pounds" Check it out I think it will be worth your reading if you are struggling with losing and are feeling a little frustrated with your Lap Band Journey. We can all blame the Band or our physician for our failures or we can all take accountability for our failures and successes. As always these are my thoughts and opinions and I hope I don't piss anyone off.
http://drsimpson.net/index.htm

 The Last 30 Pounds.pdf (2.12MB)
Number of downloads: 29

Happy Saturday Bandsters!

Hope everyone has had a great week. I finally fell like I am getting back on track from my last fill on January 30th. This time it has taken me much longer to recover and get adjusted to my meal plan, it has been like step one learning to eat all over again. I really struggled the first couple of weeks post fill and had to rely on protein shakes more than I would have liked to but I am finally eating solids 3 meals a day, no hunger or snacking between meals and able to get at least 90% of my protein with solids. I still struggle a little in the mornings with solids, but I just keep trying and eventually I know I will be able to do breakfast of eggs again. So for now breakfast will just have to be Greek Yogurt with some additional berries and a little high protein Kashi. My weight loss since the fill has finally leveled off to about a pound a week, but the rapid weight loss during the first few weeks made my hair start to fall out again. I was bad, I did not take my vitamins like I should have and now am paying for it but have gotten back on track this past week. I went back to the gym this morning, this is the first time I have done formal exercise, except walking since my knee surgery last year in November. It felt good just to make my self go, I took it slow and did not over do it, I was a little nervous and afraid I would struggle with the knee exercises but I did well. Exercised for 40 minutes than stretched for 10-15 minutes. Great way to start a Saturday, I have decided to go to the gym on Tuesday and Thursdays after work, and Saturday mornings. I am going to try hard not to over do it like I did last time so I do not re-injure myself. I also had them to remeasure me this morning and since I started the gym last year, I have dropped 23.3 lbs and 23.75 inches, not to bad since I have not exercised since September of last year. I think the most dramatic drop has been my waist and my bust. I have dropped my waist from 40 inches to 33 inches and 5 inches off my bust. Needless to say, it is time to buy bras again... Again I could put my husbands tube socks in to fill out the cups. I really need to work on my thighs, honestly out of all of my saggy body parts, I hate my upper inner thighs. If anyone has any good suggestions for some great exercises for the inner thighs let me know, I am going to concentrate on the legs so at least I won't look to much like a Shar Pia this summer. This week I was reading the blogs and really liked one that (MorelGirl) I think the blog was timely and could really hit home for a lot of us, Logical Me and Emotional Me. That blog really hit home for me, logically I always know what I should be doing but emotionally sometimes it is so difficult to remember everything I am suppose to do and not allow the emotional side win over the logical side. Take for instance, waiting so long to get a fill, I knew for months I needed a fill, but kept telling myself, you can do this, you can manage your portions, you know what to eat. Well logically, yes I do know what to eat, but it was nice to eat what everyone else was eating, little pizza, little bread, little pasta. Even thought I did not gain weight, I was not losing, I had convinced myself I was just at a plateau but honestly that was emotional me trying to convince logical me that it was OK to eat that stuff. So I will not cry over spilled milk and I will not lose anymore time feeling sorry for time lost. I am refocused, back on track and will faithfully blog and be accountable to myself. It is so easy to drift back into bad habits, and thank you Morel Girl for snapping me back into reality. So since I am back in the Green Zone and back on track I am posting a few tips for all of us to learn to live by. Please learn from my mistakes, do not give up on the band, remember to use it as the tool it was designed to be. If your adjustments are not quite right keep going back and insisting they get them right. Remember it is not the amount in your band but how you respond to the amount in your band. It takes some of us longer than others to get to our "sweet spot", some just need a little adjustment, some need more. Stay in touch with your surgeon and attend the support groups locally if you can, support is important because even though our family and friends support us if they have never been "overweight" really they can not help us or identify with us. Remember we are all individuals and we will all lose weight and have different amounts in our bands, we should never compare the amounts in our bands, we are indivduals and will all respond differently to the lap band. The most improtant thing we can do is learn from others successes and failures. Standing alone sometimes we may feel powerless but as a group we are strong and very powerful. Have a great weekend friends. Love and Good Luck to all, Diane



Lifestyle Guidelines After LAP-BAND^® Surgery

10 Tips for healthy living

Here are ten simple but important tips that will help you achieve your weight loss goals with the LAP-BAND^® System. Remember, your success depends a lot on your ability to commit to a new way of eating — and embrace your new way of living.
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1. Aim to eat three small meals a day.

The LAP-BAND^® System creates a small stomach pouch that can hold about one-quarter cup (approx. 2 oz) of food. Eating more can stretch the stomach, canceling the effect of your procedure.
2. Eat slowly and chew thoroughly.

Food can only pass through the new stomach opening (or “stoma”) if it has been chewed into very small pieces (about 15–20 times per bite).
3. Stop eating as soon as you feel satisfied.

Once your stomach pouch is full, your body receives a signal that you have eaten enough. If you rush through your meal, you may overeat before this signal reaches your brain.
4. Avoid or limit drinking before or during meals.

If you drink in the 15 to 20 minutes before, or during, your meal, the food you eat becomes liquid and the effectiveness of the LAP-BAND^® System is greatly reduced. Take only small sips with meals.
5. Limit eating between meals.

Snacking between meals is one of the major reasons for weight loss failure. You should not feel hungry between meals. If you are, it’s a good idea to keep healthy snacks on hand. Remember, to listen to your band to stay in the Green Zone. You may need an adjustment if you are persistently hungry.
6. Eat only good-quality, nutritious food.

Your meals should be high in protein and vitamins. Don’t fill up on high-sugar, high-fat “junk” foods which lack the important vitamins and nutrients you need. Talk to your doctor to determine the right nutrition and vitamin supplement plan for you.
7. Avoid fibrous food.

In general, foods that contain many fibers, like asparagus, can block the stoma. Even with thorough chewing, saliva sometimes cannot break the fibers down enough for them to pass. Try cooking fibrous foods well, then cut them into very small bites and chew them thoroughly. You’ll soon learn what your body can and cannot tolerate.
8. Drink enough fluids during the day.

Drink at least 6 to 8 glasses of water daily, in small amounts, all day long (but not right before, during or after meals). This helps you stay hydrated and eliminate waste from your body.
9. Drink only low-calorie liquids.

If you drink high-calorie liquids (even healthy ones like fruit juice) you may not lose weight, even if you are following your diet with good, band-friendly eating habits.
10. Keep moving.

This is an important tip. Physical activity burns calories and increases weight loss. Once your doctor clears you to exercise, aim for 30 to 45 minutes of moderate to high activity, 3 to 5 times a week. A lot of calorie-burning activities can be fun and rewarding.